Thursday, 18 February 2010

Has Cricket got your wicket, any questions.

Has CRICKET Got your WICKET, An explanation of the rules of cricket to the people of North America.
You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in goes out, and when he is out he comes in and the next man goes in until he is out. When one side are all out, the side that's been out comes in and the side that has been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man goes out and goes in.
There are two men called umpires who are all out all the time, and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice, after the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game.
The general rules of actual play are saturated with a glossary of terms and conditions with sub rules, with the prefixes 'Unless, depending, benefit of doubt, and other Misc Claptrap, every morsel of important cricket goings on is recorded in WISDEN a sacred hard to get book with more info on cricket than Brittanica, from the time the first ball was bowled in Hambledon Hampshire England in the early 19th century . There is more to read in Wisden than the 'Holy Bible' or the 'SevenPillars of WISDOM'.
Any Cricket Jokes?

Back on Monday. Vest.

4 comments:

CA. said...

Absolutely confusing to say the least - who was the looney who invented this game?

Vest said...

Cricket joke but true.

Two sporting brothers of the thirties to the fifties.
Denis Compton and Leslie Compton, both played for the MIDDLESEX cricket club and the ARSENAL footballclub.

Tony, NSW. said...

Aussie cricket joke. TRUE.
This is never mentioned in Australian cricket history programs within the Media.

In 1938 England beat Australia by an Innings and 579 runs.
Eng 903 for 7.
Aus 201 & 123.

Vest said...

Scumbag Cricketers

So why do we have to put up with watching our favourite sports people displaying them selves like drunken ape like louts at a Barry Dogshead afternoon Barby.
The crabby appearance of our nose picking, unshaven crutch scratching Oz Cricketers, who cheat like the blazes, even though being assumed as the best in the world, but I am not too sure about that.
Why refer to them as sporting Heros. I think not, that is bullshite.
Hardly a life threatening dying for your country situation, maybe for their opponents, when that dunny sized blonde weetbix munching dicko loses his cool.
I believe they are a bunch of arrogant actors-well paid icons. nothing else.
Are they worse than the other teams of flanneled fools?
Are Oz umpires cheating our opponents? I think so.
I believe the pommies are nice well bred players. What say you old chappie?
Where is the Wankhede Cricket stadium? Did Robbo once say, dunno I fink they all are?


? Mumbai.