Goodbye Dear Rosemary. (Final)

      It was around 3 pm Wednesday March 8 That Rosemary returned from 'Day Care', she looked fine and healthy and bubbly and gave our son  Christopher a hug and a kiss which was Rosemary all over, but in the excitement she fell and hit the carpeted floor hard and complained of a pain in her right leg .and failed to rise up.
      An ambulance was called, then after pain reducing injections paramedics took Rosemary to John Hunter Hospital near Newcastle NSW. Chris our eldest son followed and later returned with news that Rosemary was to have replacement surgery the following day.
      Rosemary at that point in time was a physically healthy 59 kilos ,165 cm tall and a Aus size 12. with an astounding fresh complexion for her 82 years - together with a happy and cheerful loving disposition  despite the slight dementia problem which was her worst worry.
      At 7 pm the following day Chris and I visited Rosemary at J H Hospital She was awake and vaguely responding to our questions but; the thing noticed first was that her upper denture was missing (This was never found) enquiries fell on deaf ears).At this point in time she had not eaten for at least 30 hours. It was also noticed that Rosemary had not eaten other than a few spoonful's of food we were told but never witnessed. however it was good to see her out of bed and sitting in a wheel chair.
      After a week at J H Hospital; Rosemary was moved to Wyong Hospital and a day or two later into the geriatric ward, .A doctor described her to my son as very weak and may possibly pass away which would be stating the obvious knowing they were not getting any form of sustenance into her tummy, Suzanne a former D/in law visited several times from far away followed by other relatives who also tried to feed Rosemary and during the weeks to follow Chris and I visited during meal times when we discovered little attempt if any by the staff to feed Rosemary due to her meals remaining untouched. To be perfectly frank 'I don't believe the staff responsible were up to the task- unqualified, which beggars belief that a person in a Coma and a far worse situation can be kept alive by hospital staff on other occasions.
      Eventually a revised menu arrived at meal times, I watch a nurse offer Rosemary food who gives up at the first attempt to go back and talk to other staff probably discussing it as matter for the "Too hard basket" . This saga continued while Rosemary Wasted away from Malnutrition and lack of care in the form of cleaning her bottom denture which Chris discovered covered in filth with  a  crawling creature within her mouth . Also during her stay in Wyong hospital it would seem she was never out of her bed and simply allowed to waste away,
      A few days before Rosemary left Wyong Hospital  Chris and I arranged to have Rosemary taken in care at the local nursing home which was quite a revelation and we were very pleased with the prospect of Rosemary being there simply because of the better care and more humane approach to the welfare of the persons in care. On Monday May 1- 17 an emaciated Rosemary arrived at the Opal Nursing Home  weighing less than thirty Kilos more likened to a victim of a WW2 Nazi concentration camp - nothing but skin and bone with sunken eyes.. the staff at Opal persevered with the feeding of Rosemary and it was pleasing to see her eating  although it was too little and too late; her last words to me on Tuesday May 2 about 6-30 p m was her reply
 " I Love You Too".

 Rosemary passed away about 7 pm Wed  May 3 , 17

ROSEMARY

      Rosemary was Born in Portsmouth England on the 5th of July 1934. her Mother and father Louise and William Cox.
Rosemary had a difficult early life due to a speech difficulty which fortunately was corrected after many hospital visits - and with perseverance  from Rosemary herself she was able to catch up on her schooling which had suffered due to the previous speech impairment.
      Rosemary was the younger of five siblings Percy, Marjorie and Audrey, and Stanley who remains as sole survivor.
      I ,  Dad.  First met Rosemary at a dance In Portsmouth that she was attending with her sister Audrey. late November 1951.  Rosemary was a pretty young lady at seventeen years of age and I was 24, She remarked to Audrey her sister; that he is nice but old. however, I was successful in dating her the following evening  unchaperoned.
      I , DAD, Was stationed in the Portsmouth Naval Barracks awaiting a ship or some perilous assignment which eventually sent me packing to Hong Kong to join a warship for  the Korean War zone, but it was to be three months after meeting  Rosemary that I waved goodbye, but then after
eight months the ship refitted in Singapore where I was  stationed ashore and was told that I was eligible  for my wife to join me in Singapore, but I had to propose to Rosemary and fortunately I was accepted, then after a few months passed Rosemary arrived on a ship to S-pore and on the 20th of June we were married in St Christopher's church In Johore Bahru Malaya  across the Causeway from S-pore Where we lived until departing for England on a ship with Christopher who had been born three months earlier.
      After living in rented accommodation we eventually bought our first house north of Portsmouth in 1956.  I was absent from home at sea on several occasions as much as ten months at a time on one occasion up to Aug 1962 by which time our family had increased due to several Back from sea honeymoons. Tony was born the 29th June 1956 with David following in June 27  1959.
It was in August 1962 having already had some twelve months ashore and living at home I had the extreme pleasure of accepting a married accompanied posting to HONG KONG Naval base for Two years plus It was the most pleasurable part of my Naval career. But it was about the time of the Chinese new year in 1964 that Andrew our fourth son was conceived and later on returning to England he was born on the 30th of October with "Made in Hong Kong' written on his little BUM. Later after a few short absence's at sea  I finally retired on pension from the RN and after several rewarding jobs;  most locally during which Our Number Five Son :TINY TIM arrived unexpectedly on the 3rd of Aug 1966 after defeating the birth pill.
It was Chris who suggested we migrate to Australia I'll blame every thing on him for what happened  after 1971 July When we sailed for Sydney on Rosemary's 37th birthday. eventually living in seven hills  and several other areas of the Sydney Met until retiring to Budgewoi 21 years ago , Rosemary and I have extended our family By eight grand and ten Great grand children and several lovely daughters in law, but as much as I love you all I must focus my attention to  Rosemary whom I shall miss terribly and Love for ever ,'"Goodbye Rosemary _ I WILL LOVE YOU FOR EVER"> LESLIE>

Goodbye dear Rosemary (3)

With love from Rosemary.
There is a video of Rosemary being interviewed by her son Chris Some of her words a not normally used in polite company, . possibly because of her Dementia .

Goodbye Dear Rosemary (2) Funeral details.

    

To bring you up-to-date and FYI. Below is my draft for the obituary to go into the Daily Telegraph this Saturday.

BOWYER Rosemary Joan nee Cox, age 82 - 5/07/1934-3/05/2017, Gorokan NSW, previously of Budgewoi NSW, born in Portsmouth, England. Wife and best friend of Leslie John Bowyer (age 90) for 63 years. A beautiful, loving lady who will be sorely missed. Daughter of William (deceased) and Louise (deceased). Sister of Marjorie (deceased), Percival (deceased), Audrey (deceased) and Stanley. Mother of Christopher, Anthony, David, Andrew and Timothy. Grandmother of Kylie, Nicole, Dylan, Bianca, Aleisha, Charlotte, Tamara and Jacinta. Great grandmother of Paige, Brianna, Braydon, Grace, Ollie, Ruby Rose, Flynn (deceased), Isla (deceased), Teddy and Harlow. Mother-in-law to Ruth, Karen, Suzanne, Rebekah, Julie W, Amanda, Lisa, Samantha and Julie B. A graveside committal service will be held at Noraville Cemetery, 35 Wilfred Barrett Drive, Noraville NSW on Thursday 11 May 2017 at 2 pm. Flowers to be delivered c/o Chris Bowyer, 4 Clucas Avenue, Gorokan NSW 2263.

Goodbye Dear ROSEMARY.

Rosemary my dear wife and best friend passed away at around seven PM today, two hours ago.
More later.