Wednesday, 28 February 2018

Do you have a new friend ?



                            Words on Wednesday.                     

    The words were chosen By (River).

      Sunlit
      Petrichor
      Squinted.
      Comfortable.
      Disrupted.
      Phones.

                                   This is my Story,.  " Do you have a new friend."

      It was quite chilly when I had opened the bedroom french windows and stepped into the sunlit seating area where my son was sitting at the table doing the daily crossword ( the one I always have to finish).

"What is a Petrichor' he asks, "Dunno Say's I, how is it spelled" " have a dekko " he Say's, I squinted in the sunlight as I bent down to read without my spectacles," Sounds dodgy to me," says I; I wouldn't eat one." His reply was interrupted by his cell phone, a second later the house phone in the kitchen was ringing loud enough to hear down the street.  both Phones ringing in concert usually meant a problem.. However, the House phone stopped ringing as I arrived; Couldn't have been that important.I thought

  I  returned to the bedroom where I stripped the bed. The cleaning lady will remake the bed with clean linen very soon.

  I am becoming set in my habits and become annoyed when my sleeping routine is disrupted during the night by the departure during the night of the heavy headboard from the base of my comfortable Queen Sized bed
.

  The large Pillow I had placed behind the loose headboard was still there when the cleaning lady arrived, who saw the pillow between the wall and the headboard and asked with a smile " Do you have a new friend "'Oh" I replied " do you mean the pillow to stop the banging on the wall' 'Just a thought Say's she"." Wishful thinking" says " I.

  This is no consolation, for the next six days I will be left with the bed making problem, the prime cause being the devastation that the demise of my dear lady wife causes me. My problems begin early. when as soon as I am dressed I have to make the bed and it is no joke making a Queen sized bed single-handed. I have to run from one side of the bed to the other and no sooner is one side smoothly tucked in than the other side gets out of order again. Making a single bed is easy: the problem of tackling a larger bed alone is one I have never had to face before.

Sweet Dreams Vest ... back soon.














Friday, 23 February 2018

Advice for Bernice,-Wipes are useless.

Antibacterial wet wipes used for killing kitchen germs are a waste of money because bugs can come back to full strength very quickly a scientist claims.
     In many households wipes have replaced cloths and scouring pads, but it has been said that if just one cell of a household germ remains on the benchtop it will multiply within twenty minutes..
     A biomedical scientist found household soap was far better at breaking down the cell walls of household germs. However, there are some dyed in the wool Kitchen Witches who have slobbered around germs since birth who are completely immunised from all known germs.

Vest  daily gaggle...back soon.

Thursday, 22 February 2018

Words on Wednesday.

The following words have been used within the following story.

MYTHOLOGY.
DISCONNECTED'.
CAMPFIRE
ROUGHLY
EXPANSIVE
SINGING.
                                     A wedding in the year of 1643.

     On the Saturday of June the 20th, much excitement and frivolity had been ongoing since the 10 AM opening of the common grounds; near the church of Saint Oliver- formerly St Mary's in the village of Middle Sodbury in the Berkshire Chiltern Hills where roughly three or four hundred politically biased drunken villagers from surrounding Hamlets had gathered to witness the high profile wedding.

Most of the villagers already inebriated and itching for violence were supporters of Oliver Cromwell and others of higher profile supported king Charles 1.  When two days earlier much blood was shed during the Battle of 'Chalgrove field' in Oxfordshire but not quite within the snobbery of the Chiltern hills, but was involved in a  several expansive cavalry charges amid Bowmen Pikemen and Archers. After a 75% casualty rate the fighting ceased with The German mercenary prince Rupert declared the winner leaving Ollie Cromwell's cousin mortally wounded and carking eight days later. Rupert was also defeated a few weeks later and returned to Germany.

The uneducated minds of the villagers steeped in mythology and their division of loyalties and political beliefs were by now chanting and singing around the campfire already. built and ready for the 'Witch Burning '  later in the day following  the Witch Hanging and the main event of the day.

 The wedding of the daughter of Sir Sherbert Fizz William, Lady Freda Mary - formerly Frederick, Mark. prior to gender change , of Middle Sodbury. The groom being 'Cyril the Morris Dancer'
son of the 2nd Earl of of Snaggleswade and lady Bertha Biganother of Brussels Belgium A direct descendant of Francis the fornicator of Paris France. At the Alter the best man Cedric  the former partner of Cyril wept in the arms of his daddy The 3rd Earl of Frogsbottom Sir Timothy the Timid and his wife ; a former harlot "Hilda the Horrible.

Due to the possible outbreak of violence between royalists and serfs, a military guard had been placed around the village.. Pike men and Archers moved uneasily  while cavalrymen awaited the inevitable.
The bride and Groom joined the other dancers and fire eaters and indulged themselves to a slice of wild pig from the Barbecue adjacent to the  bonfire to be used for the burning of the witch ; namely 'Bernice the Quick a pick pocket and bag snatcher shortly to be hanged and burnt at the stake.

Bernice Declared she was from another world four hundred years in the future a place called Dununder and in her words Say's It will be the second time ive bin anged in four hundred years time and stone the crows it aint fair to be cooked as well. The village dogs look on expectantly most knowing  who it is they are about to eat.

The air of much jollity is in full swing several fights and stabbings within the Mead and Gin tents. Finally the arrows fly and the Pike men join the fray, The village green becomes stained with blood and the Groom is killed by an arrow. followers of Sir Timothy the Timid uncover the Cannon loaded with spread shot which had laid hidden beneath a table and its covers..

The cannon fired like a clap of thunder obliterating every thing in it path.

Finally a clap of thunder booms, Bernice awakens from her drunken stupor and on hearing loud knocking on her front door dashes down the stairs to let her unexpected visitor in, looking surprised at her visitor soaking wet from the rain  Say's come on in Elsie; looks like you bin for a swim in the Torrens.

Vest ... daily Gaggle...


Wednesday, 14 February 2018

The Moggy Hilton

The accommodation provided at this top of the range Pussy retreat is beyond belief.
The owners of this extravaganza you may have guessed -I know fairly well.
Just take the tour and be amazed.
Simply Google JARVIS BAY CAT COTTAGE.

Vest. AKA LES BOWYER.

Words on Wednesday

The following prompts are the words for this Wednesday.

Glinting.
Crop.
Valley.
Particular
Cave
Deliberately.
Caldera.
Merlin.
Unicorn.
Crossbow                                               This is my  Story, Titled..
Thoughtless.
Stunning.                                                         'The Village Fete'


   The village Fete was aways deliberately held during the most promising sunny day during mid - July when it was attended by the vast majority of the population of Lower Frogsbottom, a Village within a valley of the Chilterns in rural Oxfordshire England
.
The mass hysteria, centred mostly around the beer tent and other local yokel exciting happenings were the guessing of the weight of the pig. an unfortunate little porker destined for the Barbeque, other exciting activities, like dipping the lady and the inevitable Cocoanut Shy.

As was the usual thing the opening ceremony was always heralded by the arrival of the village Squire  The Hon Sir Marmaduke Calders Smythe  The 14th Earl of Frogsbottom. and or his Trophy wife. The former beautiful Anna Comeley,  now lady Frogsbottom; three decades his junior also unknown to her husband as the Bike,

On this particular day the beautiful Lady Comely had arrived on her black stallion and wearing the Red and Black riding habit together with the riding crop, her flowing blonde hair glinting in the rays of the sun - with her stunning angelic countenance mindful of the long gone Fox hunting days of yore.

It was not only the village boys who were enjoying this spectacle but the local Damsels too who were observing the commotion being created among the four-legged fillies mounted by other less important upper-class snobs - being caused by the excitement of lady Comley's Stallion.

The seemingly thoughtless late arrival of Sir Marmaduke in his Rolls Royce motor car with the new quiet Merlin engine, suitably adorned with the heraldic sign depicting a Unicorn Together with a Crossbow; which few could understand the meaning of. the duke then announced that there had been a Cave in at the edge of the pond near his residence which was unfortunate being that the Ducking stool used in the ceremony had plunged to the bottom of the forty fathom deep pond formerly a chalk quarry some four hundred years ago

So instead of the  Ducking ceremony we are having the Witch burning ceremony being reintroduced which caused much wailing of the village Hags, who in days gone by were the unfortunate victims of this cruelty which supposedly solved the funny goings on around the time of the 1600's, when witch hunting was a sport and reduced the age of some women particularly if they were deemed as Ugly and therefore a Witch .

So being burned at the stake the body being Barbequed so to speak  meant a feed for the local dogs  or any New Zealander with a taste for 'Long Pig.'

Suddenly the whole fete area became chaotic, a fox had sneaked in much to the delight of the local dogs who gave chase among a mix of people and horses, Horses and dogs ran amok in a scene of devastation never before seen at  Frogsbottom.  No deaths were reported.

Vest .... Daily Gaggle. back soon,.













Thursday, 8 February 2018

The News paper delivered daily to my door.

   It is becoming more like a comic book with most of its pages dedicated to sport and  brothel adverts Today's top story pulverises the Australian Deputy Prime Minister , Who it seems to have been shaking his tail with one of his favourite female staffer's  currently in the Pudding club to the shock horror of his wife of 24 years and his four daughters.

  The Deputy Pm first of all ,states , "I am deeply ashamed but is madly in love with his new squeeze..
This sort of thing happens within 50 % of Australian marriages. "Quite True" say I ,. However  I am of the opinion that - that 50% involves 95 % of the countries celebrities silver tails and politicians not the common herd.

 His family state that they gave up their own careers and education to support him over the years.

Vest.... Back soon.

Old Friends who are not Blogger's

     During the last week or so.I  have received several telephone calls from aged - old shipmates whom I served  with during WW2 as far back as 75 years,  They are not bloggers and have few if any computer skills being that George H, 95 married to Muriel 95 for 70 years are in a nursing home.in Chatswood Sydney..

     Then there is Jim who phones regularly, Jim is blind and his daily carer dials the phone; he is a widower  of  94. lives alone about 80 kls north of me .

     .Finally there is Pat , 92 Married to Betty 90  for72 years they have lived in the same house in Shepparton Vic  for 65 years.

     And myself the young one at 91 widower to Rosemary , married 63 years. collectively we are the sole survivors of the  flag ship of the Brit Pacific Fleet WW2 Our total respect for each other has never ceased and never will. Hardly a week passes before I receive a call from them or visa versa
Vest not forget. lest we forget.

Wednesday, 7 February 2018

WORDS ON WEDNESDAY.

Today is the turn of Elsie AKA River, to provide the words for Wednesday.

EXTERIOR
MADWOMAN
MOUNTAIN LAKE
TWITCHED
FLICKER
DESK
Or and
(I SHALL USE ALL OF THESE WORDS ) Vest...
PREDICTION
APPROACH
BACTERIA
VAULTS
PLANE
WHITE LILAC

Here is my Story Titled: "Having a Morbid Day"

Where I stood by the WHITE LILAC bush in the back garden, the piston driven plane approaching from the south on its way to the local Airport at Newcastle in NSW Australia - its thundering noise while in its descent revived a flicker of bad memory from the vaults of time; stored in my brain from a long past era.

However, not so vivid today, instead we have a mad woman - an aged spinster who arrives at her weekender up the road with her animals each weekend , whose dogs and her screeching Galah's and Cockatoo's in her garden reply in their own way to the noise of the descending plane. A prediction of this occurring is inevitable; it rarely fails similarly to the howls of local dogs whose accompaniments to the sound of an Ambulance heading for "Heavens Door" the local retirement village where most of the local Hospital's patients originate from.

So to avoid this bedlam I retreat from the exterior into the quietness of the house where I go to the utility room to wash the bacteria of the garden earth from my arms and hands; I twitch as the unexpected coldness of the water hits my hands, having done I head for the office with a cup of tea and later while sitting at my desk hear the less noisy return of the plane heading in a different flight path over the mountain lake.

A quietness then descends for a while, then as I gaze from the front window the slow return of the ambulance from 'Heaven's Door' is followed shortly after by the all too familiar Black Van from the undertaker heading in the other direction.

Having a morbid day by Vest. Back soon.

Monday, 5 February 2018

Shopping is tiring

     I had to go shopping today being all the fresh veggies had been consumed and little else to excite the palate, although the freezer held a variety of animal flesh(NO LONG PIG) and frozen veg, my culinary attributes rarely succeed with out the inclusion of fresh veg.  The other occupier of our residence my eldest son 63 consumes most of the food in the house and proof of the pudding is that I have lost 34 kilo's in the past fifteen months without trying unless not drinking alcohol or cutting down on deserts which my wife had a hand in preparing. , but now it is my responsibility for the whole caboodle and I am pleased to know I am now just 82 kilo's..
     So off I go to the Shopping centre: 3.5 minutes driving ( yes I drive At 91.6 years of age A 4litre Ford Falcon.) I park Successfully and meet the heat , I am beginning to perspire getting to the Air-con comfort of the Centre , (two minutes walk.) The place is busy despite it being Monday, but is the lunch hour for some. I then visit Coles Supermarket  for items I have marked on my shopping list then I go into  'Priceline' a shop which discounts the  same items Cole's , Woolies and Aldi sell for more. mainly non script Pharmaceuticals cosmetics and vitamin pills, I used my Deceased Wife,s reward card  and received a 4 dollar something discount and the cheeky lady who I knew well  Say's " Thank you Rosemary" A bloke waiting to be served gave me a funny look and I hurried off to Aldi where at the check out lady Say's " been to Coles eh" Yep Say's I - Have to , you don't sell everything. " I know Say's she but will in time"
.     By this time the trolley(Cart) was fully loaded and heavy and with a mind of its own' navigating a wobbly trolley among people who refuse to move is tiresome . Eventually back at the car extremely hot .   I transferred the trolley contents into the posh English bags I had sometime ago bought while on holiday in the UK. I then prepared for the long 3.5 minute drive home after a minute of relaxing. A tap on the window and a hairy face made  an enquiry in a most ungentlemanly manner if I was staying all day. I left giving him  the one finger salute.
Arriving Home I honked for my son to come and carry things indoors  I was totally exhausted after unpacking I slept for two hours then prepared dinner.
 One day I shall retire.
Vest... daily Gaggle. Back soon.

Friday, 2 February 2018

The snobbery of Peak living

Hong Kong Island.in the sixties
     Over a period of Two years plus I had the opportunity to visit some of the homes of the more well to do residents  of Hong Kong IE Fragrant Harbour, Due to the clouds and mist most of these homes had a strange odour of dampness, some of these homes were quite old  and unlike the apartment My family occupied on Wongneichong road which circumnavigated  'Happy Valley race course, Being  the first occupants in 1962 the Three blocks of  twenty Apartments ten story's high  were high spec and sumptuous. but nothing like the vastly high blocks of concrete which replaced them in 1997 when they were demolished.
    While in Hong Kong I had the dubious luck to come in contact with many celebs of sorts and one being a Arthur Halliwell  of Brit Daily Mirror fame who wrote a column under the title of Cassandra, who you may remember if you are aged like myself; was the villain in the  lawsuit brought by  the famous Liberace against the Brit Daily Mirror  columnist Cassandra AH himself. This Vitriolic attack on Liberace cost the Daily mirror lots of Dosh.
In 1956 Daily Mirror columnist Cassandra wrote a vitriolic attack on Liberace that he took as an accusation that he was homosexual. He sued for libel, swore under oath in the witness box that he was straight, and won. His award of £8,000 damages and £14,000 costs equates to £14,000,000 and £24.400,000...today.
     My meeting with Arthur Halliwell was when he had been invited to a party within our Base  and while waiting to be escorted recalled the party he had attended 'Up the Peak', when this well oiled  Brit dowager stated, " Lovely Party Darling 'Hic' I don't think there is a soul here who lives below MAY Road"..

Vest ... Back soon.



 

Thursday, 1 February 2018

I suppose I shall have to reveal all.

Several people have asked recently"Is that you' in the Black & white Pic on your Blog Heading."
   Yes it is me. However, the pic was taken by a friend while being very silly by taking a swim from 'Little Sober Island' in Trincomalee  Ceylon (SRI Lanka) not at all clever was the silly thing which followed, when I chased this very large Black and yellow Eel in the shallows and eventually spearing same- bagging it and taking it back to the ships galley plonking it on the bench and saying to the Chinese cook ; "here you are cookie boy get stuck into this for your brekky.". What followed was sheer panic' You Stupid SOB it's a bloody great Deadly sea snake Say's cookie boy , one bite from him you gone mate.'" fortunately it was deceased when I threw it overboard but the silly stigma stayed awhile. one of my critics suggested if it had bitten me they would get a day off to attend my Funeral.    PIC Vest 1960 Aged 34

Back soon.

Vest Has Left the Building

To advise that Vest (Les Bowyer) passed away this morning. Regards, Chris (Son).