Cricket I have your wicket.

      Australia have just been beaten  by Sri Lanka in the first test in Galle S L. Last month the SL'S were soundly beaten by England in all forms of the game which does not look too good for  Australia , For those geographically dead in the head Australia is approximately 100 times greater than Sri Lanka and both have a similar population  and is 11 hours flying time from Sydney and 5hrs from Port Hedland WA Aus.
     For the people who are devoid of cricket knowledge here is my explanation of that revered and historic game. a rerun from a former post.

                                         CRICKET  IV"E GOT YOUR WICKET.
The following preamble is a laymans explanation of the rules of cricket to the good  people of North America.
You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in goes out, and when he is out he comes in and the next man goes in until he is out. When one side are all out, the side that's been out comes in and the side that has been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man goes out and goes in.
There are two men called umpires who are all out all the time, and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice, after the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game.
The general rules of actual play are saturated with a glossary of terms and conditions with sub rules, with the prefixes 'Unless, depending, benefit of doubt, and other Misc Claptrap, every morsel of important cricket goings on is recorded in WISDEN a sacred hard to get book with more info on cricket than Brittanica, from the time the first ball was bowled in Hambledon Hampshire England in the early 19th century . There is more to read in Wisden than the 'Holy Bible' or the 'SevenPillars of WISDOM'.
Any Cricket Jokes?

Vest ....Back soon... Over & 'OUT'


Anonymous said…
Shane Warne has bowled more maidens over than bowled maiden overs while playing cricket, D O M.
Vest said…

HOWS THIS for starters.
This Strange occurrence was noted in the 1950s and seemed a bit queer to most sport lovers. (TRUE)
Two brothers both played football(soccer) also cricket, for their Country (England).They also played cricket for their County team named MIDDLESEX and the top Soccer team which was ARSENAL Denis and Leslie Compton.
Anonymous said…

You are delusional. I never said that it is easy, I didn't conceive anything and I never expected you to catch on in a flash. Mind you, if you took the time to listen instead of just waiting for your turn to speak and usually completely off topic at that, you would catch on a lot quicker. If you want someone to flame at, have a go at Bill gates and his design looneys at Microsoft. Once again, you disappoint me.

Vest said…
I deleted the above comment earlier because I considered it to be rude, Unknown you are well known and the first thing about blogging is you don't get personal feelings get the better of you as it can backfire and create further problems, I further suggest you stay on Face book with your like's and dislike's.
The statement that I am delusional comes from someone I know well who has many personal problems which are hidden in his too hard basket plus far too many health problems, the main ones are of his own making being grossly overweight and a smoker , which in my mind are things to be taken care of not later but 'Now'. My train of thought is not on the same track as his smoke belching puffing billy travels on and I don't intend to buy any tickets, I am my own person and I like it that way and I doubt if I shall change although it has been said that it is never too late to learn, age comes into the equation to lessen the impact of that message, particularly when my Inbox is already on overload.

My message in reply is simple,. 'It is better you solve your own problems first before qualifying to solve the problems of others, have a nice day and try to get over it. BTW, (_X_).

Also, thank you for reminding me I am imperfect, who isn't

Anonymous said…
Even though my brother is in Sri Lankan to watch cricket, I know little about it. I have asked why a team declares and I never received an answer that made any sense to me. Actually, I don't even know declare means, well a vague idea I suppose. Cricket and golf will remain mysteries to me.
Vest said…
I wonder who is the holder of the front door and Screen door Keys who left the doors open and allowed Rosemary to go walkabout again. not me but her wiser than I carer; yes him again clever dick. I last saw her watching the television less than an hour ago, the wooden tops rang 15 mins ago; they had found her half a mile away. she is on her way home.
Vest said…
Andrew. The rules of Cricket are like a world without end; long and tedious even cricket umpires of long standing on many occasions have to consult their rule book there are a dreadful amount of wrong decisions occurring in most cricket matches.
Going back a decade or more a Sydney early morning Talk back radio bloke named Clive Robertson.(Robbo)was delivering the sports news which included a test match played in Bombay (Mumbai) at the Wankhede stadium. He stumbled along saying Australia have declared their first innings closed with only six wickets down what ever that means is a total mystery to me. then a pause when he stated ' it seems they have all got the runs they need ( probably caused by Delhi Belly) and I thought all stadiums were Wankhead stadiums. Robbo was definitely not a Sport Fascist.
Declaring means when you think you have scored enough runs you ask the opposition to bat and try to get them out under your score. A verbal description from a cricket buff would explain it better. Thanks for calling.
River said…
I know nothing about cricket, even after reading that and really have to wish to know anything about cricket.
Vest said…
Oh dear . It would seem I have done little to bring joy to the people over this cricket post, so there being little to say I shall say no more.
Except to say to the wowsers with little geographic knowledge, the name of the stadium in Mumbai was spelt correctly; sadly for some callers.
Vest said…
For the wowsers. Mumbai Cricket Stadium.

Wankhede Stadium - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.
Vest said…
River, Very few ladies are interested in cricket any more than I am interested in feminine pursuits, however, it is nice of you to provide an opinion which was less hostile than two replies deleted. Thank you for calling.

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