Which ever way this message is delivered, there are tell tale signs whether or not you are getting the truth.
Allegedly cheats provide much of the work and income for private investigators who develop their own checklists of telltale signs that should set alarm bells ringing.
I've taken the best of the bunch and provided you with a cheater’s checklist. (It can be applied equally to women to help sniff out an affair)
At the beginning of an affair, a husband may be more affectionate than usual due to feelings of guilt.
Later, once the affair has developed, he often starts finding fault with his wife as a defence mechanism to justify the affair in his mind.
Cheating husbands often lose interest in domestic activities, such as DIY and mowing the lawn.
He may have a change in sexuality and want more or less sex or make unexplained sexual requests.
The cheater's relationship with his family will almost always change. He might become more distant, cold, or fault-finding. Psychologically this is because he’s starting to blame the family, especially his wife, for his behaviour.
You may notice unexplained credit card charges or withdrawals.
Grooming habits change. He’ll probably buy a new wardrobe or may suddenly start to become more attentive to his personal appearance. You may notice him washing more, wearing a new aftershave and joining a gym.
Physical clues to the affair may start appearing, such as lipstick on shirt collars, perfume odours on shirts or jackets, secretion stains on underwear. Unexplained bits of paper, receipts, and condoms might start appearing in his pockets.
Suddenly the car might need more fuel than usual and see a husband popping out to ‘fill the tank up’ more often. Keep an eye on the odometer to check if he’s putting a lot of unexplained distance on the car. You could go as far as keeping track of distance covered (Mileage) against the time he leaves for, and returns to, work. Check payslips to verify any claims he’s been working overtime. You might notice him whispering into his phone, looking alarmed if you spot him and hanging up suddenly.
You might find that his mobile phone bill rockets and that he’s making calls to the same number right after leaving home and just before walking back in the door. Try to get a look at his itemised bill to check for unusual or repeated numbers.
He might become hard to reach at the office or on the road and starts coming home at unusual times or going to places alone
Be aware of any close platonic relationships. Many friends will not approve of the cheater’s ways but others may help facilitate it by providing iron-clad alibis.
To catch a cheater he must not suspect you’re on to him. Treat him the same as usual and give him plenty of time alone. If you think he’s cheating at home make false plans to be away for a weekend and stay at a local hotel. Park down the street from your residence, then watch and wait. Have a plan for what you’ll do if your suspicions are confirmed.
Remember; this is not just a male domain, females are quite capable too.
Need more advice. leave your title or name with your comment on Vest@dailygaggle.com
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