Wednesday, 18 July 2007

A few laughs to finish the week

The previous fortnight has been intensely busy with family & friends and it continues with a reunion of ancient mariners tomorrow and visiting Gr/ Children Friday, which leaves little time for visiting my dear friends around the world, and no time for those who are less friendly. So; see you all later.
Here are 12 (unintentional) double-entendres aired on British TV and radio.

>>1. Pat Glenn, weight lifting commentator - "And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!"
>>2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - "Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."
>>3. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - "This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."
>>4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - "Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew."
>>5. US PGA Commentator - "One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god!! What have I just said??"
>>6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: "You'd eat beaver if you could get it."
>>7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?" Not only did he have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
>>8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: "Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday."
>>9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: "There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
>>10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: "Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."
>>11. Michael Buerk on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male
>>astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: "They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts."
>>12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: "Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."


Anonymous said...

Lol! Very tongue-in-cheek!

Anonymous said...

They are hilarious!

Anonymous said...

Hi Aggie
i missed u

where u been?

Anonymous said...

Vest? Hello? Testing. 1. 2. 3.

anon said...

A deadline is negative inspiration.
Still, It's better than no inspiration at all.

Keshi said...

**>>10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: "Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."

LOL Vesty!


Vest said...

Jds rose:Testing what.

Aggie & Keshie thanks for calling.

Anonymous: I could never tell where inspiration begins and impulse leaves off. I suppose the answer is in the outcome. If your hunch proves a good one, you were inspired; if it proves to be bad, you are guilty of yielding to thoughtless impulse. Just the luck of the draw mate, have a thoughtful day.

JohnBraun said...

GEooKm write more, thanks.

An interesting rerun.

Cor blimey, What a night ! Got back to our castle from the club Via my mates house about 2am, much goings-on - still a bit of  sweari...