'Bow Wow's ' Calling cards are now readable.

DNA test for dogs poo-dunnit.

COUNCILS want to DNA-test dog droppings, so they can track down owners who refuse to pick up after their pets and send them a fine.

The hardline approach, being trialled overseas, has won support from councillors in Sydney, North Sydney, Woollahra, Waverley and Ashfield.

Genetic Technologies, Australia's largest canine testing laboratory, wants to implement the DNA testing scheme and is preparing detailed submissions for councils.

It works like this: dogs would be given a mouth-swab while they're being microchipped at the vet and their DNA stored on a database.

Council rangers would collect droppings and send samples for testing to find a database match. Owners would then receive a fine notice for failing to clean up after their dogs.

Ashfield Councillor Nick Adams says dog droppings are an "enormous problem'' and has vowed to get the ball rolling on a feasibility study.

"I support this idea and would welcome any initiative that protects the health of my residents and helps clean up the area,'' he said.

A DNA-testing program is being trialled in Israel, with a reward system for pet-owners who scoop up their dog's mess and place it in specially marked bins.

Genetic Technologies, which also does crime-scene analysis for NSW police, has set up a DNA database for Melbourne's Port Phillip Council to solve dog attacks on residents and pets.

Testing director Ian Smith said DNA tests on dog droppings could be easily implemented in NSW at minimal cost.

"DNA profiling is getting cheaper and cheaper,'' he said. ``The program will raise public awareness of the problem and the fine revenue should offset the start-up of the program.''

New Woollahra Mayor Andrew Petrie said he'd support the strategy, provided it met certain criteria.

"If it wasn't an invasion of people's privacy and, legally, you could do it, then I'd be very interested to hear more on the matter,'' he said.

North Sydney Council, where dog-fouling penalties cost up to $550, is also getting behind the plans.

"I think it's a pretty good idea,'' Councillor Veronique Marchandeau said.

"It will happen here, as long as it's cost-effective. It's one of the many tools councils can use.''

Sydney City Labor councillor Meredith Burgmann said the idea should be considered, as did Liberal councillor Shayne Mallard.

"There is a minority of pet owners who aren't responsible and damage the reputation of all pet-owners,'' he said.

North Sydney dog-owner Alex McNee had mixed feelings: "I think it's a bit heavy-handed, but I'd rather they did that than shut down dog parks. You can't take dogs to beaches any more, so the parks are all we've got.''

In the wash up of this extraordinary gathering of Sydney councils, it is yet to be decided who will be given the task of collecting poo - sorry dog shit. I am thinking there will be few takers unless the rewards are generous.

Nothing can be more off putting than to go out at night or come home in a darkened area where you tread into this stinking effluent. Suddenly the whole car stinks when it is trod into the carpet, or worse still, this is true, our grand/children are visiting and in the darkness fail to see the mess our next door neighbours dogs ( 2 of them with a dog apiece)have left in our driveway grass verge, the children run into the house with it all over the carpet. When this happened on the second occasion, I sent both neighbours a cleaning bill for $40;00 each which they refused to pay. Eventually after much haggling the local council, screwed them with a heavy fine for several offences, however,we decided to move away from this situation and are now settled comfortably, Except for 3 cats our son has left in our care, who dig up our garden plants.
A few days before leaving our last residence, we had packed most of our worldly goods and we decided to visit friends for a few days. It was Australia day 26th Jan and promising to be hot, our neighbours had set up tables and chairs plus sun shelters in preparation for the the 'Big Pissup and barby in the back gardens'.
Let it be known I am not a vindictive person unless pushed to the limit, however on that hot Australia day opportunity knocked.
Before leaving I popped up the road and bought 30 kilos of concentrated chicken and cow manure in pellets , called 'Dynamic lifter' Which when wet will stink for two or three days.This was distributed equally in both front and back gardens about 10:am then two hoses on timers were turned on for ten minutes on leaving to visit our friends. Half an hour later I stopped in a lay by and phoned both my neighbours wishing them a Happy Australia day.


Jimmy said…
if a man slaps u on the face (cheek)
turn the other cheek

- Jesus

an eye for an eye (Old Testament)
will only make the whole World blind

- MK Gandhi
Jimmy said…
I dont like dogs
I prefer cats

they bury their poo
Anonymous said…
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
When I Grow Up
ha ha ha Vic!! TY!!


Do NOT lose your grand kids in the Mall

My grandson got away from me Sunday at the mall

He approached a uniformed policeman and said,
'I've lost my grandpa!'

The cop asked, 'What's he like?'

The little boy hesitated for a moment and then replied,

'Crown Royal whiskey and women with big tits.'

Copied, by courtesey of Bridget Jones.
Jimmy said…
on the bombing of IRAQ

What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?

- Mahatma Gandhi, "Non-Violence in Peace and War"
Anonymous said…
Jimmy what connection has Gandhi and his teachings to do with dog poo?
Jimmy said…
forget dog poo
Oct 2 is Gandhis bday
Jimmy said…
I have been thinking of old age and loneliness

my children will soon be married and go away

I have a cat that loves me verry much but she is not a good conversationalist

I have a girl who is older than me
and I guess she will go before me

and then I will be alone
I want another girl who is much younger
Anonymous said…
like K for instance
Anonymous said…
the games ppl play
Anonymous said…
Good for you Vest. It's a crime that pet owners leave the mess for others to deal with. Thank god for cats.
Jimmy said…
I love my India
in the West u gotta pay to take a leak

in India u can even crap on the road for Free
Vest said…
Not everyone is happy about the 'Poodunnit thingy'.
Some Sydney councillors have expressed interest in the idea,
but Sydney mayor Ms McCaffery and former Waverly mayor Ingrid Strewe oppose it, indicating the money involved could be better spent elsewhere.
Jimmy said…
Anonymous said...
For Jimmy ---

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist's office.

The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?"

The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"

The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.

The next week, however, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.

This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.

Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?"

The old man says, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare...!

Sun Oct 05, 09:49:00 PM

Anonymous said...
Anonymous said…
u gott me stoked
Anonymous said…
Anonymous said...
Tony just got exchanged

their noses collided

Mon Oct 06, 12:46:00 AM

Anonymous said...
got engaged I mean

Mon Oct 06, 12:46:00 AM

Anonymous said...
Ashes after my daughter marries
I will be free

lets pack our bags and go to europe
there are no mice in Europe

Mon Oct 06, 12:48:00 AM

Anonymous said...
got engaged to his ass?

Mon Oct 06, 12:48:00 AM

Anonymous said...
ask Devil wooman to join in

Mon Oct 06, 12:49:00 AM

Anonymous said...
shut up u Ass
u mouse with a tiny ass

i mean

Mon Oct 06, 12:50:00 AM

Anonymous said...
on second tot No
virgins are messy

lets take Minnie

Mon Oct 06, 12:52:00 AM
Jimmy said…
no regrets

I wanna die with no regrets
some times we do things we later regret

and some times u go without making amends
if u have an unfinished agenda
death is painful
bcoz u cant let go

Dont let the sun go down on your anger
say Sorry, Thank u
I love u darling

while u can
Jimmy said…
some guys in India think we shud not talk about death

shub shub bolo they say
but i say we must always think about death

to get the proper perspective on life

we get troubled for trivial reasons
petty quarrels

these just dont matter
when its time to go
Jimmy said…
did not have three thousand pairs of shoes. I had one thousand and sixty.”
Imelda K. Marcos
Jimmy said…
I wanna kiss and make it with K before I go

err, I mean make up with K before I go
Vest said…
The last three of the dozen or so books I had a few days ago; are staying put with me. One of them is spoken for, the remaining two wrapped and saved. I shall not be wasting my precious time making pennies from selling books. All future sales will be from the publisher or B&N and Amazon. info is available from me for purchasing details. The two people who failed to send their address, after several requests, need not bother, I have no time for ditherer's, particularly number stackers.

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