Monday, 24 October 2016

Dead person trumped

The North Yorkshire Police report finding a man's body in the River Swale, near Richmond. The dead man's name will not be released until his family has been notified. The victim apparently drowned due to excessive marijuana consumption.

He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red suspender belt, a pink G-string, purple lipstick, and a “Trump for President”  T-shirt.

The police removed the Trump T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.

In spite of what we sometimes think, the police do care.


Friday, 21 October 2016

"England Expects" and remembering ABERFAN,Plus HMAS Australia.

      "England expects this day that every man will do his duty", was the signal hoisted at the yard arm of Admiral Horatio Nelsons Flag ship the HMS Victory ,commanded by Capt Hardy on the forenoon of Monday 21st of October 1805. Although certain standards of fair play in naval warfare were  expected this wasn't the case on this particular occasion, Inspections  of 'Victory's guns corroborate the fact that Grape Shot (balls on a chain) were a no no but were used during this battle against a superior number of French and Spanish ships and to add to the discomfort of the enemy upper deck gun crews and others were the bags of gravel (stones) fired by the forward guns of Nelsons fleet of ships. Can you imagine the destructive influence of a spread forty feet wide of several hundred large chunks of stone. If anyone was to blame for any infringement of the rules it would have been the orchestrator of the so called  dirty tricks Naughty Horatio Nelson  who was unable to answer any accusations due to him  being either dead or drunk on his arrival in Blighty pickled in a barrel of brandy, Kiss me Hardy, "Hic'..... Further info from Google.
October 21st 1944. on a more sombre note , this was a major tragedy when the HMAS Australia_ a County Class Heavy Cruiser was struck by a Japanese Kamikaze plane killing 30 sailors and levelling her three funnels and upper decks, I personally recall seeing the ship on her return to Sydney,
The following year 1945 , the combined U/S and British Fleet downed an estimated 2,800 Japanese Kamikaze planes, Ask me about it !!. or Read 'The Forgotten Fleet'.
October 21st 1966. ABERFAN, Wales, How can anyone around at the time forget this absolute major tragedy. It pales with most stories about unnecessary loss of innocent lives.
Practically a whole generation of children and teachers were suffocated by a descending Slag Heap caused by heavy rain, which covered the mining village. Please read this heart rending story.

Google. The Aberfan Disaster

On the 21 October 1966, 144 people, 116 of them children, were killed when a tip of coal waste slid onto the village of Aberfan in South Wales.
These pages were initially set up as part of a project to catalogue and conserve an archive of material relating to the disaster held at Merthyr Tydfil and Dowlais libraries. Their objective is to act as a starting place for those interested in finding out about the disaster. They provide an overview of the circumstances surrounding the disaster and, more importantly, a guide and link to the more detailed sources of information available elsewhere.
Remember, we must learn which matters may be breached occasionally at our convenience and which ones may never be if we are to live pleasantly with our fellow man.
Have a wonderful weekend . Vest Daily Gaggle.

Wednesday, 19 October 2016

Words on Wednedday

This is my story containing these words.

      It  all started as a silly (PRANK) which fourteen year old Bob M'Coyle will (REGRET) for ever.
Bob after breaking the chain which secured the rifle his father kept in the cellar unbeknown to Bob was loaded  Although it had been nearly a decade since the (HOSTILITY) with the Clantons had ceased Bob likened himself as a soldier when he shouldered (ARMS) and marched out into the (LIGHT) of day to where his ( ADORABLE)  little sister stood and yelled "Stick em up or I'll shoot".
Bob's sister did not respond and the expected 'Click' turned out to be a 'Bang'.

Moral. Guns are quite safe until you forget they are dangerous.

Monday, 17 October 2016


To create perfection takes time. Dissatisfaction within your Marriage or Recognised Partnership known as the 'Seven Year itch, allegedly occurs after seven years of marriage. The pace of modern life being what it is , we seem to have accelerated the process and are hitting the seven year distance within one year, and it seems more couples are unhappiest during their first year of togetherness than those which follow. The phrase honeymoon period' clearly needs rethinking, but it is still worth considering why there should be so much dissatisfaction so early. Possibly it may be due to our present day culture being so demanding of every thing being immediate. However, most happily married couples know that perfection takes time. Give it more than one year at least. ....................................................................................... WHAT IS A HUSBAND. A Husband is a man you really like and really love - he's the closest friend you've ever had.... A HUSBAND is that special man who shares your dreams for a wonderful future. He gives the special meaning to that beautiful word - Together. It really doesn't matter where we are or what we are doing so long as we have each other to share it all.   But that is where the dream ends. My wife has dementia she is eight years my junior, very little communication  ever gets acknowledged,, from our waking  hours and mid sleep I am at her beck and call , I am now responsible for all matters shopping, cooking and cleaning except for a visit every F/N by a cleaning lady $60-00 and a lawn mowing guy once a month $ 40-00, On Mon & Wed I pay $72-00 for my wife to vanish for five hours, last week they were used for health visits hence little time for any blogging action.. In between these responsibilities  I bring her breakfast in bed  see to her dental and personal cleanliness IE washing showering and providing her with clean clothing. colouring her hair  brushing her hair and a frequent visit to the Hairdresser,BTW in the past year according to my doc I have lost 17 kilos, I also suffer back pain more frequently, laying flat momentarily between chores helps, It matters little what TV programme is showing in the evenings  Rosemary sleeps through it all; and I suppose I shall be doing this until the end of my days simply because I love her, and that is all that matters.

 Just don't give upon trying to-do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong.
 Vest.... Back soon.

Wednesday, 5 October 2016

Words on Wednesday.

Todays Words on Wednesday.


                My story is about  Bill Smith and His wife Mary who live on a small (ISLAND) down the coast where the population is small until the (FLOOD)  Of vacationers and sales (FIENDS) arrive in their boatloads for a weekend of fishing and trying their best to sell you Solar panels in an attempt to (FIX) up your (PRIMITIVE) lifestyle, However, Bill and Mary Smith  are having none of these (IMPOSTERS) Who are intent on disrupting their (PRIMITIVE) lifestyle as the salespeople refer to their down to earth style living arrangements, Bill and Mary have become accustomed to living without television, radio and other electrical devices except for the Gas fuelled Barby and a supply of beer BILL say's "No Aussie should be deprived of.". Bill Say's "" Gdday".

Vest back soon.


Saturday, 1 October 2016

The No. 1 Question Your Doctor Should Always Ask You .

 The No. 1 Question Your Doctor Should Always Ask You . . .
      "How Much Water Do You Drink on a Daily Basis?"
And Why Your Answer Could Mean the Difference Between a Lifetime of Optimal Health — or Chronic Disease.
      Think about it do you really need some quack or medico to stretch the point you are not drinking enough water? of course most of you don't, however you are not doing your self any favours  by ignoring the fact that your future health is factored in by the amount of water you drink daily.
During the past fifteen years my average intake of  inexpensive clean filtered-boiled and refrigerated tap water being around two litres or  over three pints per day, thus counteracting the social sludge I slurp into my body from the stuff I enjoy, such as tea sugar dairy products Johnny Walker C/Cola and a rare coffee. also muck that hangs around In my system from a heap of other miscellaneous additives found in the crap we  call food.
Can you imagine a back yard swimming pool 30x15x5ft equalling nearly 64,000 litre's.  If you drank two litres of it each day it would take you seventy five years to empty it and start drinking one third of your neighbours pool by the time you received your birthday wishes from the Queen when finally hitting a ton.
      Although feeling weary occasionally but mentally fit and still able to enjoy life and reflect back on the extra good times you enjoyed in your twilight years.
Your life extends beyond the norm and are still getting around courtesy of your zimmer frame or motorised cart. You visit the last resting places of friends and rello's long forgotten who played with you in the school play ground. Those not incinerated and buried in their local cemetery's are difficult to .locate due to the weathering of their markers over the years but your acute brain still functioning well is able to locate the remains of your old pals who drank and smoked their way into oblivion a quarter of a century back before you reached the end of your procreative days.
      Monitoring the habits of people I have known for time immemorial one person in particular and a person I have known since I was about seventeen on my first R N Ship and four years my senior was not of great stature but well adjusted polite knowledgeable and non smoking and an abstainer from the daily eighth of a pint of neat rum, which I and others considered was the catalyst for dumbing down the lesser mortals  on RN Ships during my time in particular, the person in question is still around and now approaching ninety four years of age, is fit as a fiddle communicates with me regularly and continued each year to turn up for the long ANZAC day march in Sydney, until he reached 90 drinks lots of water doesn't drink or smoke and packed up driving last year., I expect he will be around much longer than I shall ever be, then again one cannot discount the prospects of a cock up when crossing the road or bitten by a snake behind the back shed while moving a flower pot, also the other great Aussie terminators the red back om the dunny seat and worst of all a funnel web spider in your budgie smugglers, However if you have stuck to the rules and led a healthy life your strong constitution  could be your saviour when seeking antidotal treatment.
      A case in point was made clear today by a close associate who is an avid coffee drinker -smoker and also one who leads a sedentary life and rarely if ever drinks water or eats fruit and is lacking normal exercise, I feel sad for him in his Hospital bed, mind you his predicament was helped on by a prick of a Quack prescribing the wrong treatment, we all hope he is well soon.

Have a great weekend , Give me a call, Vest........Back soon.

Thursday, 29 September 2016

Words on a Wednesday

Words for WEDNESDAY.

     These Words are here to assist you or confuse you in your .
efforts to compose a short story. These words must be used entirely within your own story. This is not an original Idea but evolves from other frequently visited blogs from which I find Interesting. VEST.

                       My story ,
       I have for some time decided I am quite HAPPY staying put in one place. Younger RELATIVES are welcome to the BACK PACK vacations, for I am quite content to PLANT my feet in one place while I prepare for the journey to one HUNDRED years. My wish is; that my heart beat will continue on from it's present TICK. TICK. TICK  as it has done for  the previous 2,838,240,000 or more occasions, hopefully, but  life is what happens when we are making other plans.
       Yes you are correct , I did use a calculator..

Vest .....Back soon.

Tuesday, 27 September 2016


     According to figures stated in todays Sydney Daily Telegraph there have been twelve shark attacks on surfers in  NSW during the past 12 months.( people should not swim in the sharks dining room.)
New South Wales Premier Politician,  Mike Baird, has been quoted as saying, 'He will not install shark nets on NSW's Killer coast to protect beachgoers' even after another young surfer was mauled by a monster great white shark yesterday, ( Well  if he does not wish to do it, Why not get someone else), I had no idea politicians were moonlighting; don't they get paid enough already  or has someone misquoted the Premier.
      The last time I swam in the ocean was at Cronulla NSW 1945. It was so different then to what it is now but the perils in the ocean were the same. At the time , I was swimming about 100 metres from the beach when a bell was ringing, being a POM (Englishman ) I thought it was the 'Ice Cream  vendor, , I paid little notice until a person yelled "Shark"  with the assistance of an old fashioned loud hailer. Fear and the need for survival gave me the impetus for speed on that occasion which I doubt I would ever again exceed.
      Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

      Vest.... back soon.

Tuesday, 20 September 2016

A re run

      Being as Barbies are the topic on Rivers blog, I thought maybe this re-run  from back a fair bit may add a little mirth but please excuse  the dodgy language, .have  fun. Read the previous Post.

      Being as Barbies are the topic on Rivers blog, I thought maybe this re-run  from back a fair bit may add a little mirth but please excuse  the dodgy language, .have  fun.

Cor blimey, What a night !

       Got back to our castle from the club Via my mates house about 2am, much goings on - still a bit of  swearing and people necking in the shrubbery, the bang clang music still blaring due to the neighbours being away places distant, I slept in the gardener's cottage(Shed) til 0800, was wakened by the visiting family of magpies tucking into several piles of vomit amid the cans bottles a broken glass reminiscent of a Barry Dog's Head Barby and general piss up. The local handyman had been summoned to clean up the chaos and had just returned from the local park after depositing the last three drunks from our back garden. Previously invitations had been sent to people with an option to bring a friend and their own grog and for those who were poor a selection of the cheapest plonk was available from the family cellar. Several half cooked steaks on the Barby being attacked by ants were cut up and fed to a couple of large crows, one of whom had flown off earlier with a condom so I was informed by her indoors who was upset about the demise of her fake Ming vase which we used as a brolly stand, then looking out of the front window after squeezing behind the sofa I trod into a discarded pizza portion when I noticed the front flower beds were in a sorry state and a lone car was parked on our frontage, Our handyman then asked me to  check out our pet enclosure where an old swimming pool housed a 2.5 baby Croc named 'Salty', Salty is quite amicable until you enter his territory , last year we found a football in his enclosure which was covered in blood, we are not sure what happened and no one has been reported missing so far , However today near a pool of blood lay a single shoe which we presumed may have belonged to the owner of the solitary vehicle parked out front.
      So it was finally decided to phone the Old Bill. After redialling a Wooden Top answered my call, I told him I want to report a possible murder.
"What do you mean a possible murder is the person deceased or what, and who is the person", "dunno Say's I, Only salty knows the guy in question and he isn't saying anything". "Where are you phoning from says wooden top" I revealed our location and he replied we have two drunk drivers in our cells who say they were at your residence last night" "Be about right" said I.
Ten Minutes later sergeant flatfoot arrived and checked the rego of the vehicle out front with a personalised plate reading SPU TOO. the owner apparently a local SP Bookie...... after DNA Checks it was confirmed it was he the bookie who salty had for a late night snack, now it is left to the bobbies to find out was he pushed or did he jump?.
Back soon, have fun, Vest. Copyright Daily

Saturday, 17 September 2016

Dear Editor.

        Having read recently several articles within your sporting pages  relating to a downturn in spectator attendances at most sporting venues, I feel there must be some skulduggery going on at the entrance turnstiles and people getting in for free by slipping a few less bucks to the ticket sellers and bypassing the electronic counters.
         Well sir I am not the least surprised, as this sort of activity has been going on for ages; in particular within my family and vastly extended family whose ingenious methods of gaining entry to sporting activities without interference is legendary.
         The gathering of our families at these sporting venues means we can have lunch together and have a chatter and let the young ones let of steam and scream and squawk to their hearts content while sharing sandwiches and meat pies, there are no leftovers our family really enjoy a good feed at most times and rarely anything goes to waste.
         Sir, as long as we have people attending  sporting venues who throw meat pies at  offending sports persons we will be there to enjoy the fun,

Flightfully Yours,  A SEAGULL.

Thursday, 15 September 2016


                              NEETS.. Not in Education Employment or Training..
      They are an army of young Australians "unwilling to work" spends the day sleeping, watching TV or playing computer games,
      Two young ladies from Mount Druitt renowned for it's high Bludger population are Ashleigh 21,and Amy 17 ( Not to be confused with the silly AMY From Swansea who pesters my blog) but two work shy layabouts who would rather spend their time chilling at 'Maccas or driving their ancient car off road for fun rather than seek employment. Ashleigh told the TELEGRAPH she would never get a job." I don't want to work all of my life and just die"
      There are more than 100,000 of these  types of young persons capable of employment and using the Social services loopholes to eke out a comfortable living which suits their bone idle lifestyle.
      Read the full story in today's Sydney Daily Telegraph. My favourite newspaper delivered daily to my door.
                                       A message for the young and lazy

       I am old and retired, I employ a gardener,  to cut the grass and a cleaner to do all of the house once  every two weeks, But I do all the shopping , Planning, Tidying up the house and Bathrooms preparing and cooking all meals and  all the kitchen chores in between cleaner visits, I also attend to the washing and bathing of my wife- plus dressing her and generally am at her beck and call. I have to spend time talking to her comforting her , which mostly falls on deaf ears. there are times when my Wife is resting I am able to write or read the paper and watch TV in the evenings where in most cases she falls asleep. I get two six hour breaks when my wife goes out for the day Mons & Frids in care which is not cheap.
      I finished my schooling at 15 and was lucky - most  kids then it was 13.   I started my first Job at 15yrs of age and was pensioned by my employer when I was 40, and they have been paying me a pension for FIFTY years, because I was worth it.  I also had  five other forms of employment improving my status each time until ceasing self paid employment at 70.
     Yes , I find time to be lazy, it is very rewarding even if only brief.
Vest ..... Back soon Snore zzzzzzzz..

Wednesday, 14 September 2016

Priests The Main Abusers.

Hardly a day passes without mention of another incident uncovered and probably more which go unreported.
The most formidable of the  Faith Industry Christian following the Roman Catholic Church, is rarely short of a sexual scandal concerning not so much Nuns but the Men of the cloth who wallow in the privilege of secret sexual activity between themselves and young children in their care. These people involved could avoid this ghastly activity. should the archaic Church of Rome  allow priests to marry like other normal males.
The alternative could be castration which would solve the sex problem completely , also retain a healthy bank of treble singers should the choir boy numbers drop.
Poverty, Ignorance and fear of the almighty allow the church to bully their charges into submission. little wonder most of these underprivileged people have few independent thoughts of their own, this is not only in Ireland as will be mentioned but worldwide, Particularly within Hispanic communities.
      160 cases of sex abuse. Church atrocity. In respect to  85 Irish priests. so far eight  convictions have been the result of allegations.
 DUBLIN:  A new series of reports into Irish catholic dioceses have revealed horrific child sex abuse by priests and Roman Catholic Church authorities in dealing with them.
     Some of the cases detailed by the church's own child protection watchdog occurred as recently as Aug 2016  and the Irish republics minister for children warned more abuse could be revealed.
      In Raphoe in the northwest of Ireland, Bishop Boyce said " horrific" acts of child sex abuse were carried out by Catholic priests over the past thirty five years. Some 52 allegations  of abuse by 14 priests were made to police.
"We are truly sorry for the terrible deeds that have been inflicted on so many by  a small minority of priests said Bishop Boyce in a statement. 'What a lot of bollocks, the general public are aware that only a few get caught in the net and most of the big ones get away'.
      A new report added; too much emphasis was placed on the situation of the accused priest and too little on the needs of their complainants.
       The republic of Ireland has been rocked by a number of such landmark reports.
The main problem as I see it is that, every conceivable authority has a built in  Catholic Church impediment which controls the whole of the non thinking Irish Hoi polloi.
And for you micks who may be offended and quote  the shenanigans or going's on  with the likes of Scoutmasters and other non faith aligned pedophiles, I'll agree that too needs attention. However, one thing at a time, and the one in hand at the moment and the most damming  are the masturbaters of the Roman Church.

BTW. No one can make you inferior without your consent..... Vest..... Back soon

Words for Wednesday in Capitals

Words for Wednesday.

The expression (DARKEST HOUR) can be that of a calamity prior to the dawn of a new era in your life after suffering the raw end of the pineapple in a (KANGAROO COURT) (OR)  those persons who (HAVE FUN) at your expense(AND) then eventually getting the better of them


Wednesday, 7 September 2016

Words for Wednesda


      The scene was the Persian Gulf in 1928,. A British Royal Navy Frigate  HMS Nonsuch was on patrol intent on subduing every  (PARASITE) in the drug and Gun running trade in the area.
       (EARLY) that morning a Arab Dhow  was sighted and was in full sail trying to avoid capture,
This one was not a (LEMON) like the others recently boarded, there were a few who were honest traders but this one was a dead cert..
     Having caught up with the Dhow. The order "Away Armed Whaler" was given. The crew of the whaler (Boat) armed with pistols and large cudgels which were  used  to (PUMMEL) any opposition into submission.
      In charge of the boat (The Whaler) was Sub Lt, Head-Strong RN, A bumptious  no-all but in truth  foolhardy to say the least.
       As the armed Whaler pulled alongside the Dhow a rope ladder was thrown down the side of the Dhow, Whereupon Sub Lt Head - Strong yelled " Follow me men, up the ladder to honour and glory"
        H S having arrived on the deck of the Dhow was met by a very large Arab with a Scimitar (sword) who promptly chopped off F H's Noddle which fell into the boat with a loud thump, Hooky the coxswain of the boat took one look at this grizzly head and asked "Any more for Honour and glory", .Being it would take some (SPINE) to repeat the folly of  HS, there were no takers so Hooky gave the order" bear off forward we  are returning to the ship.
      On returning to the ship the captain was (FRANTIC) and ordered the immediate sinking of the DHOW.. Later after the smoke from the guns had cleared  little regard was given to the crew of the Dhow,  who were now swimming for their lives in shark infested waters.


Saturday, 3 September 2016


This is a re- run of a five year old post which still has some merit. it also contains some words which may offend
Cricket lovely Cricket has nothing to do with the 1950 song created by the West Indies team when they thrashed England for the first time, Remember the last line of the song? "Those two very good friends of mine Ramadin and Valentine.
In Sonny Ramadin and Alf Valentine's days  cricket was the gentleman's game, sadly it has degenerated due to the fast moving society of today and newcomers to the game bending the multitude of rules & and regs for them to suit their nefarious activities.  Dodgy umpiring was the first to go when the ICC decided  neutral umpires would replace the local  umpires. The sub Continent teams,particularly Pakistan were prone to skulduggery, Example being Javed Miandad only getting out LBW twice In Ten years play within Pakistan but twenty fold elsewhere. Mind you the Australians without the present day technology got away with scores of dodgy Lillee & and Thompson to Marsh caught behinds,  helped by as suggested by English players patriotic Aussie Umpiring.  Cheating if possible is rife among cricketers those who deny it are those who probably engage in it. The most recent  turbulence on the cricket dodgy dealing  scene stood out like a sore thumb on film,and eventually caught  three Pakistani players red handed.  Although the first ODI is scheduled to start at midnight OZ time it is a doubtful starter due the to the previous furore.
However I'll liven up my post with a little bit of jollity.

The list of excuses for losing the game goes on and on. The whingeing and whining, piss taking, uncomplimentary remarks and pseudo friendliness plus all the hate, racial taunts and unequal conditions; especially for the losers all add up to a quagmire of confusion.

Soon to follow, a list of unsavoury remarks, can stirring and general complaints. I have received.
However, I shall liven up the proceedings with a little tale about Billy.

Billy was at school this morning and the teacher asked all of the children what there father did for a living. All the typical answers came out, Such as firemen, policemen, Salesman and carpenter etc, but Billy was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father.
Billy stated that his father was an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all of his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really good, he’ll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them sleep with him. The teacher took Billy aside to ask him if that was really true.
“No” said Billy. ”He plays Cricket for England but I was too embarrassed to say.”

The stirring continues.
Commentators are. psychic: and explain to listeners exactly how a player is thinking and what he is about to do, Then a roar from the crowd as the batsman belts the ball for six and the Comment jocks prediction cock up is lost in the confusion.
Shane the womaniser and former drug cheat was the OZ best bowler, especially when there was a farting great hole in the pitch to toss the ball into..
Shane and Gilly are in love,

Cricket ‘Hero’s, Nah, they aint mate, they don’t put their life on the line, The game is now theatrical, and they are simply well paid icons.
The Oz golliwog, formerly from the UK and the black and white minstrel show, uses his lip salve to polish the shiny side of the ball, if not why does he wear lip cream when the sun aint shining.
Warney’s dress code is frightfully scungy; he rarely looks clean and appears to look like a sack of shite tied around the middle.
Yeah your right, Being a digger I feel ashamed the Aussie test team looked so shabby with their general appearance, unshaven, gum chewing, gob spitting also crutch scratching, nose picking uncontrollable loud mouthing. is why the bastards win so often, they probably wear ribbed rubbers to get more traction in the mud!.
Bing Lee the fast bowling weetbix muncher’s hateful air punching antics, does not set a good example to the younger people in the audience, they will have plenty of time in their lives to become hateful later.
Has anyone seen an Indigenous Australian true blue not in part(Aborigine) Play in a Aussie test team?.
Nah, it’s a white boy’s game played mostly By Micks. There seems to be an abundance of blokes with given names like Paul, Steven, Michael, Gregory, Mark, Kevin, guys with saints names seem to dominate the list, the products from Priv/Catho Schooling and privilege.
Aussie commentators rarely compliment the visiting team, their one eyed chatter regarding decisions by the umpires can be very annoying, taking the piss out of the visitors and referring to it as bad play, while a crappy Oz player is described as having some bad luck.
Billy Bowden  a N Z umpire becomes an honorary Aussie citizen when England plays Australia.
It’s a fact I have been told, that, 75 % of Warne’s wickets. Are nines, tens, and jacks.
Body contact cuddling and kissing on the field of play is rife in Strayer mate, if you are a bum boy its rewarding , seems the more guys you get out the more often you get kissed..
The Daily Telegraph, my favourite news paper, delivered daily to my door is the best source of bigotry when you find the need to dislike the cricketing visitors, Journo’s like Jon Pierik (pronounced Prick) and his colleague Fanny Craddock, These two strayer bludgery galahs are great when it comes to stirring the bilges of the cricket world, the ‘Pom’ word they use in a derogatory manner, is distasteful.. In any case the first geezer J P; seems to have a greasy wop or wog name.
Do you remember Kim Hughes an ex Aussie cricket captain bawling his eyes out when he lost a test match and the then Prime Minister Bob Hawke crying too. Bob then allowed Keppler Wessells a springbok opener to be given instant OZ citizenship to play up and play the game for Ozstrayer.
Ah “Lest We Forget” The nasty episode of Bad loser syndrome which reared its ugly head in Feb 1 1981, Greg Chappell the OZ cricket Capt., was the architect of this dastardly plot aimed at preventing the New Zealand team from having a fair chance of winning the game in question. Greg ordered his sibling Trevor to bowl the last ball under arm, to batsman Brian McKechnie, which resulted in a dodgy win for the ugly Aussies. This created a short break in diplomatic relations between the Prime Ministers Bob Hawke and the Late N Z, Prime Minister Piggy Muldoon.
[Go to Google- type- Underarm cricket ball. View a 23 second video of this shameful episode of Aussie cricket history.
Why do we have to see our short arsed bald bonce wanker of an ex Prime Miniture spouting gushing commentary compliments to the Oz team on the telly. This prick and famous chicken hawk,(Draft Dodger) is paid barrow loads of dosh to run this banana republic.

***Australia’s highest cricket test score against England was what? Yes it was an innings and heap of runs but how many? Google will not provide an answer.

I wonder how many of us Aussies wish to remember the saga of Rodney Hogg and the Pakistanis. This grand display of Aussie sporting behaviour hit a high, when a Pakistani fielder threw down Rodney’s wicket and told the umpire Rodney had not grounded his bat on completion of a run despite being back within the crease but dabbing his bat (gardening) outside of the crease. Rodney looked at the umpire who put his finger up saying “Out” A disgruntled Rodney was heading for the pavilion when Asif Iqbal the Paki Capt say’s “ Return to the crease it was a misunderstanding” A smiling Rodney returns to the crease to be told by the umpire that the Paki captain was not the umpire “You are out “. At that point Rodney’s mouth exploded and he then smashed down the stumps. Did the press give him some stick? A cartoon showing Rodney as a young dishevelled street Cricketer saying, “Stick yer ball I’m taking me bat ome”
And Dennis Lilley was not averse to using his bat as weapon, on the opposing team,
Lilley-Marsh Catches, real dodgy they were.

***Well the answer is, it ain’t as big as the England score against Australia mate, it is something us Aussies or some of us don’t want to remember. Vest remembers this test match as a twelve year old, played August 20-24 in 1938, the scores were.
England, 903 for seven declared. Australia, 201 and 123, English gents (Poms) beat the shit out of the Aussies. (Bludgers) By an innings and 579 runs. This matter is rarely mentioned in Australian cricket history.

The English cricket season lasts for three and a half months; during which it pisses down with rain for a third of the time. In Australia we have a sunny seven month cricket season. The weather conditions for the remainder of the year are far better than the English cricket season.. During the off season in OZ our greedy Oz cricketers trot off to England to play for English teams, thereby robbing English youngsters to play the game, its all money money money. The question arises, do fit English sporty persons want to play cricket when the earner is far greater for playing in the football codes for nine months of the year.

Australia is without doubt the ‘Lucky Country’.
Let us not kid ourselves that Australians are superhuman with a genetic makeup entirely different from other people in our world. The vast majority of us enjoy living conditions that are far and beyond better than most other countries.
We Australians have a head start when it comes to the opportunity to become proficient in outdoor sporting activities, it is without doubt we have the best climatic conditions in the World, although the U S A has a fairly good climate, It also has a huge population to choose their best sports persons from, and will always dominate because of this factor. Cash strapped; so called third world countries unfortunately rarely compete with their maximum talent.
European countries are basically into cold climate activities, such as (Association football or soccer), Rugby league, and Rugby and snow ice and above water sports. The adverse weather conditions are off-putting to prospective sports persons.
Getting out of a warm bed on a freezing cold morning about one third of the year. Treading gingerly across the cold floor even in summer and hoping summer will be on a Friday, Saturday and Sunday instead of the usual Monday or Tuesday does put a damper on out door activities when dressed in restricting volumes of warm clothing , hardly weather for cycling or swimming or even taking the dog for a walk.

Remember the truth is always more important than bending the facts to fit your own personal theory. But it is unfortunate that, not everybody shares that opinion.

Friday, 2 September 2016

Wednesday's Words for Friday.

 This is my story.

      It was a cool but very wet Spring evening, .Although  someone had mentioned the appearance of the first (CROCUS), there was little time to stop and look for this beautiful spring flower as she made a dash for the door of her house in the pouring rain -  skidding in the wet grass her cell phone lost the grip of her hand .and  went flying into the (FOUNT). It was not a time to stop and search , but later she appeared when the rain had ceased wearing a (SHAWL) and carrying a(TORCH) Searching for and soon finding her now useless cell phone her foul (NARRATIVE) one could cut with a (KNIFE) lessening the anguish of her loss.
"Swear now,! for in heaven it will not be allowed."

Vest... Back soon.

Thursday, 1 September 2016

For Cricket lovers only

     It would seem that the Sydney Daily Telegraph  Sports writers have either been asleep or are bemoaning the fact that the Sri Lankans have handed out a good thrashing to the Aus  ball whackers in all forms of the game, yes by the team who recently were walloped by the poms or Englishmen if you wish to be polite.
     To add to this misery, the England one day cricket team have in the past two days established  another record by surpassing the previous scores of Aus and Sth Africa played on a short boundary pitch. a while back plus beating the individual score to add to their triumph with seven of their players not needing to bat in this debacle

Previous Individual score  168 now 171. previous Aus score 434,  Sth Africa 438. England now 444 with only 3 wkts down  on a pitch with longer boundaries.
There has been no mention of this info today and most likely if it is mentioned would have similar exposure as the hiding in the 1938 test at the oval in Surrey when  the England team beat Aus by an innings and 579 runs after scoring 903 for 7, the result in the Sydney Telegraph was hidden between a hair loss advert and another giving 10% off for a treatment for piles.

The last couple of days  has been dealing with health checks and other household matters which creep up on you when least expected , but all is well and shall be back on track soon.

Vest.... Back soon.

Saturday, 27 August 2016

Rain and more Rain.

      It's tiddling down and.has been for past two days, the Topsy turvy weather patterns continue making out door scheduling unpredictable. Seven weeks back a sunny 32 Cel and that is winter, indoors at the moment it Say's 17Cel;  but  outside I'm not sure more than likely cooler with a s/w wind a-blowing fiercely, I shall not bother to check it out.

      Cockies (farmers) are still griping about water allocations from the river systems in inland NSW although the drought of three years has been official declared over with joyful aplomb from those benefiting, but sadly some of these people are going from famine to floods with more rain yet to come, several weirs across each river would stall the maximum of the river water entering coastal deltas, "too costly" say some and not needed at the present time say others, life is a gamble on the land and a way of life for some,

      Back from lunch. good news the sun has appeared  and  the rain has stopped. The birds are back on the shed roof, we must be the only source of bird freebies in the area.

      Sunday we received  two more messages  from Prodigal son, him with the charisma of a wet cat , despite my leanings and his teachings, his utterances on the sabbath are to be deplored. " Son You can't have more" , my money machine is deceased. and your tough demeanor is unwarranted, as long as your present attitude to your parents and siblings remain your pleas will fall on deaf ears. The saga will no doubt continue.

     I expect a back lash from the previous paragraph

     The rain has stopped and a fair breeze blowing and I must remove my backside from this seat and get some walking time in.
      Christopher's health is improving and would improve more if he moved more and smoked less, it doesn't make sense to me why intelligent people knowingly allow themselves to self destruct.
Thank you those friends and relatives who have found time to communicate recently your bonding is appreciated. that's all for now, back later. Have a great weekend, love you all  Vest Daily Gaggle.

BTW.  Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your pet parrot to the town gossip. 

Thursday, 25 August 2016

Words on Wednesday

The following are the words for Wednesday


My Story begins.
                             It was 5AM and Flying Stations again, the fleet would go to Action Stations within the next hour. Already a tedious situation experienced a score or more times with even more expected as I watched the aircraft take off from the A/C Carriers (WHISTLING) down the flight deck as I drank coffee from A (THERMOS) flask.
     The Seafires, Hellcats, and Corsairs were usually first in the air, followed by the heavier (FIREFLIES), and Avengers, the last two having had a (CHECKERED) career  while taking off from the flight deck and ending up in the briny and lost.
     It would be two hours or more before the sons of Nippon would follow our planes back to the fleet dressed in (SOLEMN) attire, their last living moments before they and  chunks plus (SLIVERS) of metal and  Miscellaneous  parts of the crashing aircraft and its occupant would scatter onto the decks of the ships of the fleet.. Vest not forget.

Wednesday, 24 August 2016


Saturday, 20 August 2016

Quietly going about it..

Quietly going about their business but such a pity some smoke too.

Doing it quietly is not always the case arriving at that pinnacle of bliss, but there are somethings you just cannot change and one of them is that human beings like making babies, so it is nice to know the majority of us are quietly going about the business of keeping the human race going, and it seems those who are leading the charge are women in western Sydney the city's true heartland.
Now this is good for the economy and-more importantly-good for brothers and sisters. It's not scandalous or outrageous but behind closed doors across Sydney little miracles are being made every day.
Unfortunately some women are making headlines for the wrong reasons, I suppose you might say this a spin off from a former post of mine "Kiss a non smoker and taste the difference"(Archives March 23-05). Most intelligent people who smoke are probably aware that smoking for the first thirty years of your adult life will reduce your life expectancy by up to ten years and also reduce hanky panky within the boudoir considerably too. those who have stopped puffing will tell you I must have been nuts not to have packed it in long ago. However, it is sad when the habits of mothers who smoke will in turn give their unborn child a legacy of lung and breathing problems to deal with for the rest of their lives. I am reliably informed that around twenty per cent of pregnant women continue to smoke during pregnancy against strong advice from health authorities. I say it should be mandatory by law for women to stop smoking during pregnancy and measures taken to forcibly isolate them from tobacco products in order to guarantee the optimum health of the new baby.

Twenty three years ago just prior to Christmas I was suffering from a severe bout of colley wobbles-an undefined medical problem which was giving me a few bad moments with ongoing pain. In the washup the Doc informed me I would be dead within three months if I did not cease smoking. From that moment on for me fags were a thing of the past, I had too much to live for, my health improved and gave me more powers within the boudoir.
However, I still believe that the Doctor was a lying sod, but I had little time to Question his wisdom.
Vest.... Back soon.

Thursday, 18 August 2016

Words on Wednes day

   Words on Wednesday


       It was at the final occasion of our Association Annual General Meeting and Barbeque. We were all old shipmates who had kept in touch over the years - Vets from WW2 and other conflicts, all in our Eighties, but that was more than ten years ago,. The (SHADOWS) of time had already decimated our once forty odd strong membership ; but now we were only just able to make a quorum .
plus three.
     It had been a hot day and while the (ICE CUBES) clinking  in our glasses (UNTIED) our tongues which  gave way to airing a (WHIMSEY) or two from the past while (FLUTTERING) Butterflies  chased each other from the (SHADOWS) to (SUNBEAM) around the flowers wilting in the heat and  flies a-plenty arrived for a feed on the leftovers on the unattended Barbeque.
     Yes this is the land down under - Australia, hot and sticky; the land which became our future - remembered as British Navy Sailors who fought In the Pacific WW2 and returned to live out our lives in the land of OZ.
George 93, Jim  93, Pat 90, and Les 90. All ex boy sailors at sea when 16. yrs of age. Yes you get it , Just Children.

Vest ..Back soon.

Wednesday, 17 August 2016

My words for Wednesday

While I am waiting for the recovery of WORDS  from a blog far afield, I shall post those of my choice - chosen at random , simply for my own amusement being I am at a loose end today, Fifteen words from a hat six drawn by my wife of 63 years; Rosemary who has dementia..

Wow these are hard to digest, fortunately my wife has gone to her Club? today for a few hours, so my mind will be able to concentrate, so after a few stumbles here we go.

     The first time I sent a book out and I got all these (REJECTIONS) I said to myself, Well, they (DIDN'T) even read it. The (FACT). of the matter is that you did something wrong, You need to find out what it is. Either the way you packaged it and presented it to the publisher was wrong, or you chose the (WRONG) publisher.. Your writing was (TEDIOUS). your writing was unprofessional and your manuscript was sloppy You (DIDN"T know the market. You know you did something wrong with that book. You need to go back and you need to throw that book away. you need to find out what it is that you need to learn how to do (BETTER).
Many of life's failures are people who did not realise how close they were to success when they gave up.
Vest THE DAILY GAGGLE, Back soon.

Monday, 15 August 2016

Religeous Hatred the great divider

This was sent to me by an Italian!!!
Interesting info! Must read Give the Title... can u?!!!!!!

You know the Latin Catholic will not enter to Syrian catholic church, these two will not enter to the Marthoma church, these three will not enter to penthacost church, these four will not enter to Salvation army church, these five will not enter to 7th day Adventist church, these six will not enter to orthodox church, these seven will not enter to Jacobite church, ? this there are 146 castes in Kerala alone for Christianity, each will never share their churches for Christians ! Wonderful One Christ, One Bible, One Jehova?.What a unity !

Among Muslims, Shia and Sunni kill each other in all the Muslim countries. The religious riot in Muslim countries is always between these two. The Shia will not go to Sunni mosque, these two will not go to Ahamadiya mosque, these three will not go to Sufi mosque, these four will not go to Mujahiddin mosque?.like this it appears there are 13 castes in among Muslims, Killing / bombing/conquering/ massacring/? each other ! The American attack to the Muslim land of Iraq is fully supported by all the Muslim countries surrounding Iraq ! One Allah, One Quran, One Nebi?.!

Great unity !

For Hindus 1280 books, 10,000 commentaries, more than one lakh sub commentaries for these foundation books, 330 million gods, variety of aacharas, thousands of Rishies, hundreds of languages,?still everyone goes to the SAME TEMPLE? whether unity is for Hindus or in others and never Quarreled each other for the last ten thousand years in the name of Religion.

I shall be busy today so I posted this earlier info from a friend, as I find it is always easier to draw on the storeroom of memory than to find something original to say, particularly when one  hurts one's thumb in the kitchen and swears  using the wotsit word and get's told off by her indoors to whom I reply, " We must swear while we may for in heaven it will not be allowed".

Vest... back soon.

Saturday, 13 August 2016

Politicin Aint what it seems to be. AUSTRALIAN GENERAL ELECTIONS .

SYDNEY Town in the land of OZ was in a pre election frenzy. The two main Antagonists were a newcomer to fed politics (labor) bloke, Saint Kevin Rudd wearing red. and the (conservative -Liberal) Dead beat Bush suckhole and chicken Hawk Prime Miniature, J, Winnie, Howard in blue.

Friday, 12 August 2016

The blonde Mortician.

A man who'd just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.
The female blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.
The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the Blonde mortician a blank check and says, 'I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.'
The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly...
She says to the mortician, 'Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied.. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?'

To her astonishment, the blonde mortician presents her with the blank check.
'There's no charge,' she says.
'No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!' she says.
'Honestly, ma'am,' the blonde says, 'it cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice.'

'So I just switched the heads.'

Thursday, 11 August 2016


Today's Words are as follows.


                                   This is my story

      The former master of the seized ship sat forlornly on the stern thwart holding the tiller of the 32  foot Cutter possibly wondering what went wrong. The ships crew or most of them had been abused or flogged at the slightest whim of the their officers and their attendant security namely six marines. the wife of the Master being one of the main reasons for the mutiny; who demanded the flogging of all persons who would dare look upon or drool over her gaze-worthy form.
     The plot was quite simple. The second mate Mr Vest and  now Master designate, suggested a  birthday party  be held and on the lower deck and invite the six marines whom they easily filled with rum and were soon snoring.. The mutiny commenced when the marines were (ABDUCTED) one after the other at the point of the (SHARP) end of a bayonet on the end of a musket Stolen from the marines while asleep.. One by one the marines and officers were rudely awakened from their slumbers to be taken to the upper deck and ordered to climb down into the ships the pouring (RAIN). Soon after a baricoe of water and provisions were sent down to the boat which was now swinging a fair bit in the wind and waiting to be lowered on the crest of a wave in a boiling (SEA GREEN)  ocean.
Finally the order to " Let Go' was given and the disengaging gear dropped the boat and the boat cleared the side of the ship and was seen later wallowing up and down with a lady still in her night attire screeching with (FROTH Covering her sea sick face.
      Fortunately the persons in the cutter would soon reach land fall for what it was worth, being there were (THOUSANDS) of islands in the near vicinity - mostly populated by people yet to become subordinate to a foreign power and with a taste for 'Long Pig' , Maybe a Great white variety would soon be on their menu
        "Ready about" came the order from the new Master -  Captain Vest who pointed the ship to Rio and freedom. rather than Sydney and incarceration..

Monday, 8 August 2016

2nd Words on Wednesday.

2nd Words on Wednesday.


Below is my Composition.

I know a business executive, a modest man recently out of CONVALESCENCE after a serious accident, no tears  for this brave man so save your TISSUES, his EMPATHY towards the Guilty party in the accident shows the type of person who is rarely defeated. No problem, no set-back ever gets him down. He simply attacks without RANCOR each difficulty with an optimistic attitude and a sure confidence that it will work out all right -.together with an EXPERTISE where he does not need to DANGLE a juicy carrot to persuade a client. He seems to have a magic touch on life-a touch that never fails.

Vest ... Back soon.

Sunday, 7 August 2016


     Although it is relatively warm when compared to winter in some parts of the Northern Hemisphere, Like Alaska, Siberia and Minnesota in the USA, we still find that it is the rapid rise and fall in temperature which creates the misery of the winter head colds, influenza and the constant sniffles and watery eyes. The average temp here on the Cent/Coast 5 cel- 21 cel midday, colder when we have winds from the South.
     We all know them, every workplace has at least one, some have more-the office martyr.
The person although as sick as a dog, insists on coming to work and making life hell for everyone who has the misfortune to be there with them that day.
These people sniff, wheeze, cough and splutter their way through the day, moaning about how ill they are but how much a good example they are for coming in to work.
They leave a trail of infectious germs on every thing they touch, which in turn their colleagues are exposed to, you will find them on the Bus or on the train Spreading infection to other travellers.
To all those who think they are "soldiering on", stop being a hero and a asshole, no one appreciates your self assumed martyrdom.
You are not a better employee for turning up for work, you are not fully productive when you feel that bad. Nothing at work is so important that it can't wait a day or two and if it is someone else will surely take charge of it.
You will cost your employer more by taking down other workmates and fellow travellers
with the coughs and colds you spread around.
Stay at home rug up and rest in bed with your favourite person or a good book, Its the best and only way to enjoy your predicament, remember catching the flu is a privilege

Vest ... Back soon.

Friday, 5 August 2016

Wednesdays Words on a Friday

Words for this Friday are as follows.

My composition follows, ' Memories when a child of nine during the thirties in merry England '..

     When I was a child I would WANDER  around the FAMILIAR local countryside and into the woods or COVERT as was the local term . These woods would play host to many forms of flora and fauna which had survived the ravages of urbanisation and development. I came well prepared with my box of sandwiches and my towel and outer clothing hoisted above my head as I waded into the chilly water hoping there were no hungry fish seeking a juicy meal of a large worm. On dry land I dressed and went foraging for hazel nuts which normally would be in abundance at that time of the year, however  my arrival created much ado and scurrying from the colony of Red Squirrels who would BOLT to take cover up the trees faster than the eye could follow them.
      Having found one tree which unfortunately had  been harvested  I knew my search for those SWEET TEMPTING nuts was  going to be a futile exercise and I assumed that if one tree  was laid bare the others would be too and the fruit of the Squirrels labour stored away out of sight for the Squirrels winter hibernation and. It was nice to know those pesky Grey American squirrels had not found and destroyed this colony of local Reds, this was due to their habitat being completely surrounded by water .leaving them totally isolated.
Chalgrove Oxford ENG !935.



Junk Mail Help: When you get 'ads' enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these 'ads' with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away.

When you get those 'pre-approved' letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope. Most of these come with postage- paid envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular postage 'If ' and when they receive them back.
It costs them nothing if you throw them away, but the postage charges increase according to weight, so in that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it into these cool postage return envelopes.
ANOTHER GREAT IDEA is: Send an ad for your local plumber or chimney cleaner to American Express and a Pizza coupon with the assortment of supermarket gunge to Citybank. if you become over loaded with junk mail, stuff it in an old large used envelope and stick their return paid envelope to it.
If you wish to remain anonymous, make sure your name is not on anything you return.
The banks and credit card companies are currently getting back a lot of their junk by mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Lets let them know what its like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they will be paying for it...Twice!.
Let's help keep the postal services busy since they are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, and that is why they need to increase postage costs again.
If enough people follow these tips it will work.

 I wish I could send back some of the hostile mail I received from wowsers  on the cricket post..
 Anyhow, have a nice day.
 Vest... Back soon.

Sunday, 31 July 2016

Cricket I have your wicket.

      Australia have just been beaten  by Sri Lanka in the first test in Galle S L. Last month the SL'S were soundly beaten by England in all forms of the game which does not look too good for  Australia , For those geographically dead in the head Australia is approximately 100 times greater than Sri Lanka and both have a similar population  and is 11 hours flying time from Sydney and 5hrs from Port Hedland WA Aus.
     For the people who are devoid of cricket knowledge here is my explanation of that revered and historic game. a rerun from a former post.

                                         CRICKET  IV"E GOT YOUR WICKET.
The following preamble is a laymans explanation of the rules of cricket to the good  people of North America.
You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in goes out, and when he is out he comes in and the next man goes in until he is out. When one side are all out, the side that's been out comes in and the side that has been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man goes out and goes in.
There are two men called umpires who are all out all the time, and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice, after the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game.
The general rules of actual play are saturated with a glossary of terms and conditions with sub rules, with the prefixes 'Unless, depending, benefit of doubt, and other Misc Claptrap, every morsel of important cricket goings on is recorded in WISDEN a sacred hard to get book with more info on cricket than Brittanica, from the time the first ball was bowled in Hambledon Hampshire England in the early 19th century . There is more to read in Wisden than the 'Holy Bible' or the 'SevenPillars of WISDOM'.
Any Cricket Jokes?

Vest ....Back soon... Over & 'OUT'

Saturday, 30 July 2016


     My Computer has been upgraded and its content is completely unlike its predecessor , it will take time for me to get around it al.l.
Words for Wednesday are below..

Plus "I was wondering if you could solve a silly argument". ..

This is my composition  for today's words.

      I was wondering if (SOMEONE) Or you could solve a silly argument ? My eldest son aged 61 is telling me that my new PCW10 is easy. My son has spent several ( DAYS) converting my aged PC into something his brain conceived and expects my 90 year old noddle to grasp this altogether new system in a flash, well he is wrong as I am aware it will take me far more time than he did to conceive it,. to him it is simple. However, as I sit (LONELY) at my PC wondering if a (HOAXER) has been at work being that all of the bells and whistles I knew before have been substituted for a host of new ones and has left me like  jumping (HOPSCOTCH) from one square to another and in turn getting me (HOTTER) under the collar with frustration.
     A few years before I joined the RN I was taught  or better still I leaned the Morse Code and the Naval code of Flag Signals, although when the USA entered the WW2 the Morse code remained the   same (SOMEONE) minus a brain made a confusing decision and the flags were substituted for the International code, meaning the same flags indelible in my head were given differing meanings.  However there was one exception.
The Navy flag 'C,' A square flag envelope shape divided, black to mast , blue to fly, red to deck and yellow on high, became flag Z or Zee as was pronounced by the US Navy, so C became Zee but for all intents and purposes the meanings remained the same,  Flown at the mast head  It's meaning was the same in both codes "I Require a Tug".
Other Meaningful Flag signals may seem humorous like flag 'V' White with red X marking like the Irish flag it means " I need assistance" or that of the Scottish flag - flag M - White with Blue X meaning " My vessel is Stopped"..About right I reckon.

"The Best is yet to be" .... Vest Back soon.