Friday, 19 May 2017

Goodbye Dear Rosemary. (Final)


      It was around 3 pm Wednesday March 8 That Rosemary returned from 'Day Care', she looked fine and healthy and bubbly and gave our son  Christopher a hug and a kiss which was Rosemary all over, but in the excitement she fell and hit the carpeted floor hard and complained of a pain in her right leg .and failed to rise up.
      An ambulance was called, then after pain reducing injections paramedics took Rosemary to John Hunter Hospital near Newcastle NSW. Chris our eldest son followed and later returned with news that Rosemary was to have replacement surgery the following day.
      Rosemary at that point in time was a physically healthy 59 kilos ,165 cm tall and a Aus size 12. with an astounding fresh complexion for her 82 years - together with a happy and cheerful loving disposition  despite the slight dementia problem which was her worst worry.
      At 7 pm the following day Chris and I visited Rosemary at J H Hospital She was awake and vaguely responding to our questions but; the thing noticed first was that her upper denture was missing (This was never found) enquiries fell on deaf ears).At this point in time she had not eaten for at least 30 hours. It was also noticed that Rosemary had not eaten other than a few spoonful's of food we were told but never witnessed. however it was good to see her out of bed and sitting in a wheel chair.
      After a week at J H Hospital; Rosemary was moved to Wyong Hospital and a day or two later into the geriatric ward, .A doctor described her to my son as very weak and may possibly pass away which would be stating the obvious knowing they were not getting any form of sustenance into her tummy, Suzanne a former D/in law visited several times from far away followed by other relatives who also tried to feed Rosemary and during the weeks to follow Chris and I visited during meal times when we discovered little attempt if any by the staff to feed Rosemary due to her meals remaining untouched. To be perfectly frank 'I don't believe the staff responsible were up to the task- unqualified, which beggars belief that a person in a Coma and a far worse situation can be kept alive by hospital staff on other occasions.
      Eventually a revised menu arrived at meal times, I watch a nurse offer Rosemary food who gives up at the first attempt to go back and talk to other staff probably discussing it as matter for the "Too hard basket" . This saga continued while Rosemary Wasted away from Malnutrition and lack of care in the form of cleaning her bottom denture which Chris discovered covered in filth with  a  crawling creature within her mouth . Also during her stay in Wyong hospital it would seem she was never out of her bed and simply allowed to waste away,
      A few days before Rosemary left Wyong Hospital  Chris and I arranged to have Rosemary taken in care at the local nursing home which was quite a revelation and we were very pleased with the prospect of Rosemary being there simply because of the better care and more humane approach to the welfare of the persons in care. On Monday May 1- 17 an emaciated Rosemary arrived at the Opal Nursing Home  weighing less than thirty Kilos more likened to a victim of a WW2 Nazi concentration camp - nothing but skin and bone with sunken eyes.. the staff at Opal persevered with the feeding of Rosemary and it was pleasing to see her eating  although it was too little and too late; her last words to me on Tuesday May 2 about 6-30 p m was her reply
 " I Love You Too".

 Rosemary passed away about 7 pm Wed  May 3 , 17

Friday, 5 May 2017

Goodbye dear Rosemary (3)




With love from Rosemary.
There is a video of Rosemary being interviewed by her son Chris Some of her words a not normally used in polite company, . possibly because of her Dementia .

Goodbye Dear Rosemary (2) Funeral details.

    
To bring you up-to-date and FYI. Below is my draft for the obituary to go into the Daily Telegraph this Saturday.



BOWYER Rosemary Joan nee Cox, age 82 - 5/07/1934-3/05/2017, Gorokan NSW, previously of Budgewoi NSW, born in Portsmouth, England. Wife and best friend of Leslie John Bowyer (age 90) for 63 years. A beautiful, loving lady who will be sorely missed. Daughter of William (deceased) and Louise (deceased). Sister of Marjorie (deceased), Percival (deceased), Audrey (deceased) and Stanley. Mother of Christopher, Anthony, David, Andrew and Timothy. Grandmother of Kylie, Nicole, Dylan, Bianca, Aleisha, Charlotte, Tamara and Jacinta. Great grandmother of Paige, Brianna, Braydon, Grace, Ollie, Ruby Rose, Flynn (deceased), Isla (deceased), Teddy and Harlow. Mother-in-law to Ruth, Karen, Suzanne, Rebekah, Julie W, Amanda, Lisa, Samantha and Julie B. A graveside committal service will be held at Noraville Cemetery, 35 Wilfred Barrett Drive, Noraville NSW on Thursday 11 May 2017 at 2 pm. Flowers to be delivered c/o Chris Bowyer, 4 Clucas Avenue, Gorokan NSW 2263.

Wednesday, 3 May 2017

Goodbye Dear ROSEMARY.

Rosemary my dear wife and best friend passed away at around seven PM today, two hours ago.
More later.

Monday, 10 April 2017

The 'TOO HARD' Basket.

       My visits to the local hospital; a short 4 minute drive and a brisk hundred metre trot to the single occupancy ward where my wife Rosemary is incarcerated usually ends on a note of complete frustration. Apart from the failure to communicate with Rosemary which is difficult due to her dementia.
       It would seem  the staff who deliver her meals have lost the plot and offer her meals that she cannot  handle due to the loss of her lower denture at the previous hospital and from my observations 99 % of her meals go to waste, a couple of spoons of soft desert is the usual intake..
       I have noticed several hospital staff attempting to feed Rosemary  but give up all too soon, I doubt if they have the expertise required which is obviously an essential part  of their employment.
      Rosemary is on a drip containing some mysterious ingredient which is helping in someway to sustain life, however, she has lost so much weight she is beginning to appear like a 'Belson' inmate.
      Yesterday Sunday , I questioned several members of the hospital staff about this problem and I suggested that they find someone with psychological powers of persuasion to entice Rosemary to eat her food on command when necessary - being the staff are all too ready to give up trying to feed her.
     Another problem is getting her mobile. a nurse told me that 'we don't try to make her walk if she does not want to',  definitely something lacking in that statement.
      So it seems that, under the hospitals rules of engagement rules  their best option is the 'Too Hard Basket' and the expiration of the patient resolves all of their problems. And by the way should you get to read this, keeping the ward tidy  and in order around the bed and furniture would also help to give the impression that you care, although the politeness and smiles of the staff is noted, it will not improve  the condition of the patient without some practical achievement which is what you are employed for, no more excuses , get to it. I will be calling in the Hospital soon.
Vest  .... back soon

Who reaches with a clumsy hand for a Rose must not complain if the thorns scratch.

Monday, 3 April 2017

Rosemary up and moving.

 Not a lot of info on Rosemary  now recovering slowly from her Hip OP. Rosemary has been up and walking with assistance, however her recovery would be advanced if she ate better and tried a little harder to respond to that which would help her recovery, her dementia is the root cause  and despite separate daily visits by  Chris and myself and other family members  very little is  getting through to Rosemary her main utterance's border on abuse , mostly " Go away -leave me alone".
Today the Hospital staff will dress  her in  her street clothing  hopefully trying to get her back to a less horizontal bed bound lifestyle, we can only hope she will respond.
Thank you all for your best wishes  for her recovery.

Vest ..... back soon.

Tuesday, 21 March 2017

Rosemary recovering.

My visit to Rosemary this afternoon was more rewarding than usual, she seemed much brighter and talkative, however, she is still not eating as well as she should, her main meals are left mostly untouched, but today with the help of a pretty young nurse,  Rosemary ate most of her desert but still declined the main meal. Maybe with a little more perseverance will see Rosemary back to eating normally once more,
The Company Director of  Hawksbury cleaning and, "Bowyer's' Carpet laying and cleaning, visited his mum Rosemary with his lovely wife Samantha and beautiful daughter Charlotte. Thank you Andrew..Our other sons and their families  have used FACE  BOOK  which is our son Christopher's media thingy as mentioned earlier I have enough on my plate without the agonies of F B,

Warning this may offend, The first explanation of Face Book

Wednesday, 21 November 2007

Friday, 17 March 2017

Face Book,. A No goer, But thanks all the same.


 For  FACE BOOKERS                                                                                                                                                                                       eI You  may be aware I have not not posted much over the past three months and this was due to  moving to a new residence and being off line and otherwise busy with packing and unpacking  plus now we have the additional problem with hospital visits and associated problems of Rosemary's  upper limb fracture and future rehabilitation. however, recently Christopher our eldest took it upon himself to promote a Face Book Thingy on my behalf and without consultation, he being aware of the restrictions within my life style should not have done so without my consent which is fairly obvious  a 'No' thank you'. Chris will be aware of this by now and hopefully will be able to rectify his work and inform his followers ? This is not a stab at Face Booker's  they have their own idiosyncrasies and like so do Bloggers If you find it tough going contacting me, try my blog, simply post something like FB, Like. Dislike. K M A.  Or  D  D  Y  B.......... Have a nice. day; I am sure it will be better than mine at present.

Vest back soon.

Goodbye Dear Rosemary. (Final)

      It was around 3 pm Wednesday March 8 That Rosemary returned from 'Day Care', she looked fine and healthy and bubbly and gave ...