Laugh yourself Horse

-
Within hours of the news that Tesco's 'all beef hamburgers' contained 30% horse meat, these quips hit the Internet:
o I'm so hungry, I could eat a horse … I guess Tesco just listened.
o Anyone want a burger from Tesco? Yay or neigh?
o Not entirely sure how Tesco are going to get over this hurdle.
o Waitress in Tesco asked if I wanted anything on my Burger … so I had a £5 each way bet!
o Had some burgers from Tesco for my tea last night … I still have a bit between my teeth.
o A woman has been taken into hospital after eating horse meat burgers from Tesco. Her condition is said to be stable.
o Tesco are now testing all their vegetarian burgers for traces of unicorn.
o I've just checked the Tesco burgers in my freezer ... AND THEY'RE OFF.
o Tesco now forced to deny presence of zebra in burgers, as shoppers confuse barcodes for serving suggestions.
o Said to the missus, “These Tesco burgers given me terrible trots."
o To beef or not to beef. That is equestrian.
o A cow walks into a bar. Barman says, “Why the long face?”. Cow says “Illegal ingredients, coming over here stealing our jobs!”
o I hear the smaller version of those Tesco burgers make great horse d'oeuvres.
These Tesco burger jokes are going on a bit. Talk about flogging a dead …
Agggghhh NO! NO NO NO! And last but not least —
Have you tried Tesco Meat Balls? — They’re the dogs bollocks!!
 
Sent in by Malcolm P. U/K. Vest back soon. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

OPEN FORUM. This is a new concept in blogging.

-
In future ALL posts on this Site will have a section to be known as 'OPEN FORUM. this is to be introduced as from now and a reminder of this promulgated at each time a new post arrives. Open Forum comments are not restricted to the current post, however, it would be advisable not to retro too far into the archives. When referring to comments in archives, you will be advised to mention the post and it's date. Open forum comments Shall Not relate to the current posts, and must be headed 'Open Forum. Open talk opens the way to further talk, as does wine or love, and a little bit of gossip is good for the soul, another good thing about gossip is that it is within every ones reach. The more the pleasures of the body fade away, the greater to me is the pleasure and charm of conversation.
Read more

Contiued from previous post.

-
I was close to home when I saw the Coal delivery man open our front gate. I watched as the big lurcher dog from the mill mounted one of Auntie Parker's Scots Terriers in the flower bed. Auntie flapped her arm yelling "Someone do something"., The Coal man promptly dropped his sack of coal and grabbed then squeezed the lurcher's testicles. The poor dog, his his coitus interrupted,let out an unearthly howl and shot off down the road his back legs hobbling in a three legged sprint. My adopted uncle Robert was a queer old cove. he lived in a large three storey house by the river cherwell in Oxford with a man servant?. Though his sexual preferences may have been questionable, his meanness certainly wasn't. Uncle Bob rarely bought a newspaper, always choosing the library for such information, and always rode a bicycle twelve miles to visit us. The day he turned up late hot and flustered with a puncture I was sent to the Post Office to buy a puncture repair kit that cos
Read more

Words on Wednesday

-
The following prompts are the words for this Wednesday. Glinting. Crop. Valley. Particular Cave Deliberately. Caldera. Merlin. Unicorn. Crossbow                                               This is my  Story, Titled.. Thoughtless. Stunning.                                                         'The Village Fete'    The village Fete was aways deliberately held during the most promising sunny day during mid - July when it was attended by the vast majority of the population of Lower Frogsbottom, a Village within a valley of the Chilterns in rural Oxfordshire England . The mass hysteria, centred mostly around the beer tent and other local yokel exciting happenings were the guessing of the weight of the pig. an unfortunate little porker destined for the Barbeque, other exciting activities, like dipping the lady and the inevitable Cocoanut Shy. As was the usual thing the opening ceremony was always heralded by the arrival of the village Squire  The Hon Sir Marm
Read more