Saturday, 26 April 2008

Ballooning Catholic Priest Ascends to Heaven. I hope he had his Passport.

Priest drifts out to sea harnessed to 1,000 party balloons
Priest floats off on balloons, the dimwitted locals swear he has gone to heaven
Priest Adelir de Carli floats skyward harnessed to 1,000 party balloons - and hasn't been seen since. Adelir, 42, doing the stunt to publicise his parish, was missing yesterday after drifting out to sea off the southern coast of Brazil.

Now that is the perfect way of getting rid of these Bum rustling paedophile priests .

Pommmie thinks he is getting it tough.
As us Aussies get the Grand run-around too, still its a gripe worth listening to.

Don't you wish that you had written this?Subject: Passport Application. Dear Minister, I'm in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through. How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date? How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time. Do you people do this by hand? You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30-odd years. It's on my health insurance card, my driver's licence, on the last four passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election. Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother's name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father's name is Robert, and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!. I apologise Minister. I'm obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to activate the Fifth Reich for God's sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week's well-earned rest away from all this crap. Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one. AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some tosser to confirm that it's really me on the goddamn picture - you know... the one where we're not allowed to smile in in case we look as if we are enjoying the process! Hey, you know why we can't smile? 'Cause we're totally jacked off! I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am -- you know, someone like my doctor...who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN...Yours sincerely, An Irate British Citizen.

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Listen now! New music from the Rogue

7 comments:

Jim said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
tqmcintl said...

come to Goa India
no VISA hassles

u can apply on net

jim said...

Jim said...
heyyy VEST a catholic priest goosed me too?


why the anger?

tqmcintl said...

hehehe

Anonymous said...

Rosemary

Dear friends, it's been said that happiness is contagious, and when you reflect happiness then all others around you catch the happy bug and are happy too... so it has occurred to me to have a "Dessert Carnival Day", here, at the House in the Roses, and show our happiness while baking and displaying our most wonderful dessert creations. This is how it works: Send via email a photograph of one of your homemade dessert of your choice. You can post more photographs along with the recipe on your blog, the day of the carnival. I'll post your pictures and put some fun music on my blog, inviting you to join in the fun. Leave me a comment telling me the name of your dessert and make sure you have a link for me to get back to your blog.



The carnival will be held at the House in the Roses at 8:00am on Wednesday, April 30, just in time for spring. Limit one entry per entrant. Please advertise this party on your blog beforehand by adding this graphic, visitors will come find you and join in! It promises to be FANTASTIC!!!PLEASE ADVERTISE THE CARNIVAL ON YOUR BLOG. Here's a smaller version of my graphic, right click and save to your hard drive. Then use it freely. You may use the larger one if you prefer.
Posted by CIELO at 8:08 AM 41 comments
go here http://houseinroses.blogspot.com/

Jim Dean said...

it was nice of u to drop in at the garden with Rosemary


u have to submit a dessert with the recipe and pic

CIELO said...

Hi Vest.... Thanks for visiting my house in the roses, it's a pleasure meeting you.

Blessings

cielo

Goodbye Dear Rosemary. (Final)

      It was around 3 pm Wednesday March 8 That Rosemary returned from 'Day Care', she looked fine and healthy and bubbly and gave ...