Thursday, 22 February 2007

THE ALL AMERICAN HUSBAND STORE

The Husband Store
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . .you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord. The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework. "Oh mercy me" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!" Still,she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

7 comments:

amy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Amy...Swansea. said...

I will stop at #4 But fer gawds sake forgit the lord factor.

Vest said...

Life Backwards
Now here's a thought...
Living Life Backwards
I want to live my next life backwards.

You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.
Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension. Then when you start
work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until
you're too young to work.
You get ready for High School, drink alcohol, party, and you're generally promiscuous.
Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you
have no responsibilities.
Then you become a baby, and then...
You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in
spa-like conditions - central heating, room service on tap, and
then..........
You finish off as an orgasm.
"What a way to go"
I rest my case………………………!

kate fb said...

hi vestie, this a quite a change from cricket, a colleague in the office told me about the lost balls and women cricketers, how rude! and your remark about 'Licking' was very saucy too. and i do like the husband shop, very funny, taking the piss is you all over, see you tomorrow. kate xox

lower deck lawyer said...

yeah Kate it would take more than than a spash of mint sauce to get me interested

Vest said...

LDL: A re-think of your opinion would be in order if you took a gander at Kate.

Amy: I have a friend who may be interested in your charms. E mail your E address for details. he is 38 g/l and no baggage, ok.

Frank bell said...

Most of the eligible females I have come across in my native America could be categorized as sixth floor floosies, nuff said :(